# Flame Room is going downhill



## Lisa.

Too many happy people in here lately  BUGGER OFF.
MOAN FFS
There was a time when you could come into the flame room and have a good old moan and groan Â 
with other miserable people. ( or at least flirt :-X)

Where have they all gone?

Too many shiny happy smiling people. Grrrr.

And will someone tell Tosspott to stop being nice to me because I just don't trust him. :-/


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## David_A

Nice arse


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## kmpowell

Nice cnut


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## Lisa.

too late its gone
(Sorry,thats Chubby Browns fault will feel embarassed by that in about 10 minutes, so will delete)


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## kmpowell

Horrible kitchen


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## jampott

recorded for posterity...



> Where's yer manners, everybody knows its tits first
> (Sorry,thats Chubby Browns fault will feel embarassed by that in about 10 minutes, so will delete)


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## Lisa.

FUCK


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## kmpowell

> FUCK


Not just now thanks.


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## Lisa.

No that would be FUCK?


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## kmpowell

> No that would be FUCK?


Not just now thanks.


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## jampott

no brussels, else I'd be interested......


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## jampott

Anyway, I had a right good fucking flame the other day... I'm doing my best to keep this place right in the fucking gutter where it belongs......


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## scoTTy

> no brussels, else I'd be interested......


Moany gits who bring up stuff off a forum so long ago that was also secret and no one else here remembers it. GGGGrrrrrrrr 

P.S. I'm sure I hated the sprouts more than you or Vince so shut your face!


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## jampott

ahhh i remember the good old days. before s-lines, before people's kitchens, before dropping windows even....

ahh, them were the days... but try telling the kids of today that, and they won't believe you....


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## paulb

You miserable old gits. fuck off!


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## kmpowell

> Moany gits who bring up stuff off a forum so long ago that was also secret and no one else here remembers it. GGGGrrrrrrrr Â


Mig Test?


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## kmpowell

Gotcha Mr Scott!!! 

Pig test?


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## Lisa.

Brussels ?
Brussel sprout = shout
or Brussel Sprouts = Scouts

WTF?


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## phil

> Mig Test?


NO. Don't fucking start that again KP. It'll be bikes and veks next


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## kmpowell

> Brussels ?
> Brussel sprout = shout
> or Brussel Sprouts = Scouts
> 
> WTF?


Have you been to florence?


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## Lisa.

At LAST a proper old slanging match.

What ever you are all on about ..........carry on


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## kmpowell

> NO. Don't fucking start that again KP. It'll be bikes and veks next Â


 ;D


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## Lisa.

Oh hang on .

You are actually talking about Brussell Sprouts the vegetable.

Oh I see.

I was still thinking about Sherman Tanks

sorry carry on


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## Lisa.

> Have you been to florence?


Yes that was me.


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## phil

> I was still thinking about Sherman Tanks


Naughty girl.


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## David_A

Old shit - never got involved in that - still at least the ftse below 4000. Who the fuck would've thought that! MGF drivers are twats, Julian blowseed fuckwits a fuckwit.

Hows about giving Vlastan a weeks 'freedom on the forum' pass for the past few weeks good behaviour. Should get some controvisy flowing.

Still nice tits nice arse.

Dave


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## paulb

You're right Lisa. Everyone has gone soft. Giving vlastan freedom? what next group hugs and therapy?

Bollocks to all of you!

Tinpott is the only worthy whinger amongst you...


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## Lisa.

Yeah Pisspott, and even he's going soft on me.


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## kmpowell

paintpoTT


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## PaulS

Are you knocking one out for JampoTT?



> Yeah Pisspott, and even he's going soft on me.


FFS, get your act together Lisa


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## Lisa.

yeah and you KMP, you are supposed to ignore me.
PlantpoTT is supposed to swear at me and call me nasty names.
Whats going on round here?

Bunch of wooftas


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## t7

> Yeah Pisspott, and even he's going soft on me.


hmm you'll have to give us a nudge on Sat if you need some time _alone_ to rekindle that hate/hate relationship 

....can't have you two becoming the best of chums or we will get even less cutting sacasm and verbal abuse to liven up our day : :

L


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## Lisa.

> Are you knocking one out for JampoTT?
> 
> FFS, get your act together Lisa Â  Â


Its not me its him.

I insult him and he doesn't bite.
Its just not the same without the posse.


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## Lisa.

> hmm you'll have to give us a nudge on Sat if you need some time _alone_ to rekindle that hate/hate relationship Â
> 
> ....can't have you two becoming the best of chums or we will get even less cutting sacasm and verbal abuse to liven up our day Â : :
> 
> L


Fuck! you don't really think he'll come do you?

What one guy and 4 girls?


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## t7

I think turning up will be the piss take!! ;D

I'm sure we'll do lots of girly bonding so we'll then Â have a pussy posse of our very own Â 8)


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## Lisa.

cool!
A pussy posse
[smiley=gorgeous.gif] [smiley=gorgeous.gif] [smiley=gorgeous.gif] [smiley=gorgeous.gif] and a Â [smiley=elvis.gif]


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## t7

> [smiley=gorgeous.gif] [smiley=gorgeous.gif] [smiley=gorgeous.gif] [smiley=gorgeous.gif] and a Â [smiley=elvis.gif]


four tarts and a boyscout? ;D


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## phil

4 drag queens and elvis


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## jampott

I look nothing like Elvis


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## phil

OK, so I was talking about the smilies


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## jampott

actually i'm sporting a rather dodgy quiff today, so perhaps I do afterall 

but will someone save me from this evil woman. I think I preferred Barely_Legal - come back, all is forgiven - the arguing is so much more comforting.......


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## jampott

> Fuck! you don't really think he'll come do you?
> 
> What one guy and 4 girls?


I'm only going to annoy you sweetheart, and do some shopping 

Can probably manage 2 of the other 3 though, if anyone is interested? 

*lol*


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## scoTTy

I thought you could handle a flock at a time Â ???

Paul B - Piss off this forum, we don't want no Vauxhall owners on here! 

Oh and take that bloke with the shopping trolley with ya!!!


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## jampott

Sorry ladies, strict limit of 2, and no grannies please......


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## vagman

Get back to yer feckin knitting.


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## Lisa.

knit one, purl one, knit one, drop one, purl one, purl one ......erm knot one, oh fuck this


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## jampott

> oh fuck this


what?


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## jampott

damn, the witty ripostes have all dried up...


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## Lisa.

sorry I must have nodded off into my cocoa.


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## jampott

> sorry I must have nodded off into my cocoa.


yawn, what an exciting life you lead. you should really get out more....


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## garyc

Wankers. This isn't a flame - merely a string of very lightweight banter.

Cue Pythonesque 'Argument' sketch.


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## Steve_Mc

> Cue Pythonesque 'Argument' sketch.


No it won't.

FFS I'm now reduced to flaming a post that flames a thread that flames the flame room. What's the forum coming to?


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## Lisa.

> No it won't.
> 
> FFS I'm now reduced to flaming a post that flames a thread that flames the flame room. What's the forum coming to?


Yeah too right.

Whats the matter with everyone?

There must be something left to moan about. TTotal's gone quiet, Vlastan is well behaved, even Abi has tweaked her squeaks.
R1 is too pissed to care, KMP simply forgot, Jampott has lost the plot, Nutts is going on holiday, Sundeep got himself married (and isn't allowed to play).

GaryC its over to you to do something before I delete my profile and join the caravan club and take up rambling. Â Â Â


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## thorney

> I thought you could handle a flock at a time Â ???
> 
> Paul B - Piss off this forum, we don't want no Vauxhall owners on here! Â
> 
> Oh and take that bloke with the shopping trolley with ya!!!


Blimey o'reily, here I am wondering about the forums watching you twats all make cnuts of yourselves and I have this abuse from the mobile chicane himself. ;D

Go fuck yourself you lardy wanker  ;D

{whispers} careful of PaulB, he's all serious on the VX board now, I suggested he piss off to Africa and I hoped the lions would chew his ass and he got the hump, I think he's upset cos all the neighbours think he's been made redundant cos he sold his 'nice Audi' to get a 'Vauxhall kit car' {whispers} ;D ;D


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## garyc

> Yeah too right.
> 
> Whats the matter with everyone?
> 
> There must be something left to moan about. TTotal's gone quiet, Vlastan is well behaved, even Abi has tweaked her squeaks.
> R1 is too pissed to care, KMP simply forgot, Jampott has lost the plot, Nutts is going on holiday, Sundeep got himself married (and isn't allowed to play).
> 
> GaryC its over to you to do something before I delete my profile and join the caravan club and take up rambling. Â Â Â


Hmmmm. I've tired of wardrobe themes for now....scratches head.

I am building up quite a head of steam about the Lifestyle positioning and branding of womens sanitary products on TV and in magasines.

Actually, I'm quite content at the moment. Summers coming, boat's in water, new car on way, enjoying the gardening, Mrs C is being delightful, work still shit - but who wants to hear work rants?

Hmmm. I could also rant about sodding IT contractors not knowing what side of the bed they are buttered on....

Must dash - got ot be in Hatfield b 1pm. Will muse a few rants on the way.


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## saint

oooo - I was soo temtped to do a "wankers with boats flame" esp those that park the f'n thing in the driveway and only use it once a year. ;D


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## BreTT

> oooo - I was soo temtped to do a "wankers with boats flame" esp those that park the f'n thing in the driveway and only use it once a year. Â ;D Â


You mean wankers that have boats, drive a BMW and lurk on TT Forums? Wankers!!! ;D


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## saint

Yeah - those types ;D


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## IanWest

And his boat has only got a little engine ;D


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## PaulS

Just checked in, and _ still _ no proper ranting going on, fucking flame room .........


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## Lisa.

aye

*sigh*


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## garyc

> oooo - I was soo temtped to do a "wankers with boats flame" esp those that park the f'n thing in the driveway and only use it once a year. Â ;D Â


Try Marina


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## jampott

You've got a Marina on your driveway? I thought after the Allegro you would have learned your Austin / Morris lesson......

Sad fucker....


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## Guest

quality... nothing like madam lisa. to bring the flame room to life [smiley=vampire.gif] .. 24 hours later and a shit load of posts......

easy now :-*


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## garyc

> Sad fucker....


Stuff...


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## PaulS

> aye
> 
> *sigh*


 : Are you taking the piss ?


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## PaulS

> quality... nothing like madam lisa. to bring the flame room to life


You little tyke you Â


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## Guest

yea !


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## PaulS

> yea !


ROFLMAO! Whoops, Sorry Sundeep, the tyke reference wasn't directed at you :-[ :

:-X :-X :-X :-X I was hoping somebody else was going to answer that question  ;D  ;D


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## jampott

and now this flame is going downhill too.....


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## paulb

> {whispers} careful of PaulB, he's all serious on the VX board now, I suggested he piss off to Africa and I hoped the lions would chew his ass and he got the hump, I think he's upset cos all the neighbours think he's been made redundant cos he sold his 'nice Audi' to get a 'Vauxhall kit car' {whispers} ;D ;D


I got the hump? Pah? You know I have the skin of a rhino (and the build before you chip in Forney).

Piss off with yer shopping trolley. At least I have the courtesy to get an estate car that actually is fucking slow!

You do know that to get a stereo fitted to a VX turbo is an engine out job don't you?


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## Lisa.

Right I do have a moan and this one pisses me right off Â and I've said it before BUT

Stop referring to calling your damn cars as HER and SHE.

And now fecking CONCORDE is being referred to as a SHE.

They are ITS.

For Fucks sake.


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## jampott

My car is a "SHE" and she also has a name.......


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## paulb

Climb inside her twice a day just sounds right...


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## jampott

yeah I think L. is just jealous..... the "female" objects of desire and adoration on this forum are all made of metal


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## Lisa.

> My car is a "SHE" and she also has a name.......


 OH FOR FUCKS SAKE


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## Lisa.

> yeah I think L. is just jealous..... the "female" objects of desire and adoration on this forum are all made of metal


Damn and I so wanted you to desire me. :-/


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## jampott

oh god, now she's found the font size button..... wonders will never cease.....


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## jampott

> Damn and I so wanted you to desire me.


Oh I do, I do, I do

NOT

Get a grip love, the only thing you are good for is taking the piss out of....


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## Lisa.

TosspoTT


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## jampott

ahh thats better... back to the bitching and slanging match....


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## Lisa.

*Yawn*


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## jampott

well we all know how this ends. She'll stomp off in a huff and come back with a different name....

p'raps this time it'll be barely_literate or little_miss_understood or maybe she'll think up something thats actually funny.....


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## Lisa.

I'll be going then :'(


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## Lisa.

HA
Just Kidding!

You don't get rid of me that easily.

You'll have to suffer me for just a bit longer.


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## t7

for fucks sake you lot!

I dont post for a couple of days because Ive got so much fucking work to do and the ONLY bright spot when I come back is that there are 5 new screens of posts on this thread and then I start reading and its this lightweight CRAP.

Proof if any were needed that moderating the forum leads to mediocrity. We need some of the lawless olden days where you called a cnut a cnut and they (verbally) punched your lights out......

but not me of course coz im a girl and we dont do that kind of thing  I just like to watch ;D


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## jampott

Louise,

I daren't say what I REALLY think about Lisa for fear of starting a war on Saturday....

You honestly don't want a spot of "claret" on your conscience do you?

But don't worry, I'll put away the light ammunition and reload the cruise missiles come Sunday morning.....


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## t7

*lol*

you and Lisa will be as nice as pie to each other on Saturday...

and then even the lightweight _frisson_ of hatred that we have today will be replaced by you guys sending each other birthday greetings and enquiring about what you did at the weekends


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## jampott

> you and Lisa will be as nice as pie to each other on Saturday...


probably right - I was taught to have respect for the elder generation - its not nice to be rude to old folk that probably faught in the war for me and everything....


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## Lisa.

yeah too right. And wear your fucking Poppy.


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## paulb

I've still got a Help the Aged badge I can post you Tim...


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## Lisa.

You never know, JampoTT, I may turn out to be just your type Â [smiley=clown.gif] [smiley=elf.gif] [smiley=freak.gif] [smiley=vulcan.gif] [smiley=vampire.gif]


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## head_ed

> You never know, JampoTT, I may turn out to be just your type :


If you like men that look like Del boy Lisa!   ;D

_only joking matey!_


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## jampott

Can you "baa" like a sheep though?


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## head_ed

> Can you "baa" like a sheep though?


darling I thought you'd never ask!  ;D


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## jampott

> darling I thought you'd never ask!


God, not you, you prick!!

Del Boy? erm.... ok Trigger, whatever you say


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## Guest

JampoTT & Lisa. you both are a great double act..... 
;D ;D

the last couple of pages have been the finest comedy that I've seen since....... er.... well since a while ago anyway..... [smiley=thumbsup.gif]

;D ;D ;D


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## scoTTy

I just wish they'd shag each other and get it over with!

After with so much passion in the posts, it must be a love/hate relationship.

[smiley=sweetheart.gif]


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## vlastan

> I just wish they'd shag each other and get it over with!
> 
> After with so much passion in the posts, it must be a love/hate relationship.
> 
> [smiley=sweetheart.gif]


Aha!!! Now that shagging is discussed here too...I can add my views! Â 

If you Timmy boy and Lisa girl consider having anal sex...please take this advice....use plenty of fucking lubrication....initial penetration can give you a sweat...but then it is heaven!!

For any more tips...contact Dr Vlastan!!

Can we now go back to the old great days when Anal sex was mentioned all the time? Â ;D


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## scoTTy

So the week long ban really worked then? Â :-/


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## vlastan

It worked very well...but by popular demand, it looks like people want my old banter back!! ;D

What do you say Scotty?


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## jampott

> After with so much passion in the posts, it must be a love/hate relationship.


Its EXACTLY like a love/hate relationship except without the love bit...... :-/


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## Guest

> Its EXACTLY like a love/hate relationship except without the love bit...... Â :-/


we ALL want a full write up of this saturday's meet


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## vlastan

> we ALL want a full write up of this saturday's meet Â


...and we want it to be published in the TTOC newsletter!!


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## jampott

Don't get your hopes up, folks - it'll be more like "Crimewatch" than "Baywatch".......


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## vlastan

> Don't get your hopes up, folks - it'll be more like "Crimewatch" than "Baywatch".......


Lisa may not take this very nicely!! Are you suggesting that Lisa is flat chested and not a babe? 

Lisa...you must defend yourself and prove that these allegations are unfounded. So can you have a topless photo of yourself in the forum please? ;D


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## jampott

> Lisa may not take this very nicely!! Are you suggesting that Lisa is flat chested and not a babe?


You missunderstand, Lord V. I've no doubt Lisa could have passed off as Pammy 30 years ago - but I was actually referring to there being zero chance of "hitting it off" versus a much stronger chance of "hitting each other".........


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## head_ed

> but I was actually referring to there being zero chance of "hitting it off" versus a much stronger chance of "hitting each other".........


LOL.....will anyone be selling tickets? Swindon is looking more appealing by the minute......  ;D


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## jampott

Nah... pointless to sell tickets. Its gonna be a damp squib I'm afraid.... Mart, you know full well I'm not this bolshy in real life and fear I'll actually be running away and hiding when she turns up, and NOONE wants to see that 

(there, I guess thats me wimping out!)


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## Lisa.

Head Ed you bringing your camera then?

I reckon you could charge for copies.

Less than 24 hours till showtime!



> Nah... pointless to sell tickets. Its gonna be a damp squib I'm afraid.... Mart, you know full well I'm not this bolshy in real life and fear I'll actually be running away and hiding when she turns up, and NOONE wants to see that
> 
> (there, I guess thats me wimping out!)


oh Maybe not. Seems JampoTT is a wimp afterall. ;D


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## jampott

Oi, I was trying to call a truce (sort of).....


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## Lisa.




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## jampott

is that a "no U-Turn" reference or are you just expecting me to have a canoe in my pocket?


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## PaulS

> LOL.....will anyone be selling tickets? Swindon is looking more appealing by the minute......  ;D


It is indeed. Showtime Â  Â Blind date for real Â 

I will be driving past Swindon....... at about 9 o'clock in the morning to go to work Â : any chance of an early Kick off? ;D Â

What if things go totally the other way? Â


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## Guest

hhhmmm

i think we should start taking bets to see who kops off with who what happens...  

Paul.... as you are going past Swindon in the evening, check up on the forum as you might be needed to post bail for these two love birds [smiley=gorgeous.gif] [smiley=jester.gif]

;D ;D


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## Lisa.

You do all realise I'm 59 and married ( divorced, married, divorced, married) and the last time I was weighed I was probably heavier than most of you lot. :-/

Didn't you wonder why GaryC refers to me as Beergut? Â :'(Â

I think it'll be more like Surprise Surprise than Blind Date. 

I wonder if he'll still be game for old lady Tonsil Hockey or whether I've scuppered me chances.


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## phil

hmm. sounds like swindon's the place to be tomorrow


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## t7

> hmm. sounds like swindon's the place to be tomorrow


I'll post to let you know what happens if Donna and I make it back safe from the front line... :-/


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## Lisa.

Now I'm getting scared.

I think I'll stay at home to finish me knitting.
I don't want to become an exhibit in the Forum Freak Show :'(


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## t7

naaahhhh Lisa just think of all the lovely _shops_ 8)


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