# Dettol - WTF!?



## ScoobyTT (Aug 24, 2009)

So, the solution to germs on your hands is to wash them, obviously. Basic hygiene. Great. Nothing to see here. Unless you're Dettol.

But wait... the soap pump itself harbours germs. FACT. Apparently. Oh noes. We're doomed. DOOOOOOOMED!! 

What is the solution? A no touch soap pump. A battery-operated motion-sensitive soap pump that dispenses soap when you move your hand underneath it. Clever. And *totally *fucking unnecessary!

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't the only time you touch the soap pump when you pump some soap so that you can, you know, WASH YOUR FUCKING HANDS to remove any germs that might be on them? If washing hands with ordinary soap is good enough to save us all from pork flu, why the chuff do we need motion sensitive handwash dispensers? :?

Aren't they solving problems that just don't exist. My home doesn't need every surface to be 99.99% germ free thanks. Who buys this shit? [smiley=bomb.gif] :lol: :lol:


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## Super Josh (May 29, 2009)

Yeah noticed this too. You'd think bringing this kind of product out during a recession would be marketing suicide?

Josh


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## ausTT (Feb 19, 2010)

ppl buy all kinds of shit -- but this is as you say TOTALLY FUCKING POINTLESS


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## Charlie (Dec 15, 2006)

LOL not seen the advert for this particular item - it really does sound the most pointless of devices though, however people like gadgets in fairness and they are simply gadgetising the process  tossers

Charlie


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## wallstreet (Oct 19, 2009)

Charlie said:


> LOL not seen the advert for this particular item - it really does sound the most pointless of devices though, however people like gadgets in fairness and they are simply gadgetising the process tossers
> 
> Charlie


Having successfully had two kids, the best thing you can do is let them get like kids to build their immune systems, so as adults they are not weak little squirts!

I saw the ad too, nuts, but here in Geneva there are parents who in their late 30s to early 40s make my gf use hand dettol!!!

Analysing the ad I thought, germy hands go on taps to open it, as you wash, your hands now clean touch the dirty taps!!! Oh hell, you get paranoid!!! Lol


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## YELLOW_TT (Feb 25, 2004)

Just orded 3 dont know how I managed to stay alive with out them


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## ScoobyTT (Aug 24, 2009)

:lol: Sadly the fear-mongery has gone global!




A possible paraphrasing:
You're invited to trust this friendly whitecoat who explains that the downside of visiting a local market is that you get to smear your shoulder with live shit. You may think you're having fun with an umbrella and having some quality time with your family but actually you're just smearing disease-laden shit all over the people you love. Look, your kid's inhaling it. Your husband's forehead is covered. He's as good as dead!

When hiring a crop duster to disinfect everything in the neighbourhood is inconvenient, luckily you can reach for some antiseptic soap to sterilze you and your family. Lather up, MILF, and enjoy the comfort of your sterile home. Spray your family with slum water in TOTAL confidence! Just don't touch the flowers. They might be germy.


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## T3RBO (Dec 9, 2003)

wallstreet said:


> Having successfully had two kids, the best thing you can do is let them get like kids to build their immune systems, so as adults they are not weak little squirts!l


So true :wink:


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## ScoobyTT (Aug 24, 2009)

I've just seen another advert, this time claiming that bacteria can survive in molten lava. MOLTEN LAVA!! :lol: :lol: 
Therefore they MUST survive in your kitchen unless you use Dettol. :x This is absolutely fucking ridiculous!









*Volcanoes - worse than your chopping board, says Dettol.*

1) The kinds of bacteria that live in a kitchen cannot live in molten lava. Mainly because *nothing *lives in molten lava!
2) The kinds of extremophile bacteria that can stand hot temperatures don't live in your bloody kitchen. They live in places like hydrothermal vents at the bottom of the ocean. The bottom of the ocean is, by pure coincidence, the ideal place to relocate Dettol's marketing folk.
3) The archaeal Methanopyrus kandleri Strain 116 grows at 122 °C, which is the highest recorded temperature at which any organism will grow. (http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/article ... =pmcentrez) 
4) Archea don't infect humans anyway.

So why don't Dettol ditch the sinister cow and her "FACT" bullshit, and stop trying to scare the crap out of neurotic housewives?


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## YELLOW_TT (Feb 25, 2004)

T3RBO said:


> wallstreet said:
> 
> 
> > Having successfully had two kids, the best thing you can do is let them get like kids to build their immune systems, so as adults they are not weak little squirts!l
> ...


Well said


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## Hipflyguy (Jun 1, 2006)

ScoobyTT said:


> :lol: Sadly the fear-mongery has gone global!
> 
> 
> 
> ...


You have made my day with your rant and 'translation' Scooby.

We who are about to bathe in the squaller of humanity salute you.


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## Charlie (Dec 15, 2006)

ScoobyTT said:


> :lol: Sadly the fear-mongery has gone global!
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Back on form buddy, back on form :lol: :lol: :lol:

Charlie


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## ScoobyTT (Aug 24, 2009)

Dettol is BACK! This time they're presenting the product that can save humanity from the scourge of spring. Know your enemy: the fresh air, the sunshine, the greenery, and of course the bloody allergens. The pesky allergens that you're only allergic to because you keep your family cooped in a hermetically-sealed building and run around sterilizing everything every five minutes like some neurotic loon.

In this public disinformation film we see a dramatization in which insurgent dandelion seeds flying in formation enter the house through the open windows, hellbent on human destruction, and blend seamlessly into surfaces where the children are playing. The children! Why the house will be knee deep in snot in a matter of moments if mum doesn't do something right now.









*Dandelion clock - A ticking time bomb of domestic terror*

Luckily mum saw the nature-demons and knows where they are. Also she has Dettol with which she can save the rug rats from the stealth dandelions and other allergens that seek to conquer humanity from the deadly world outside the window. Simply spray on Dettol whilst grinning, and wipe off. Behold! All the terrorists are swept up in the cloth/tissue and can be disposed of.

You know, the kind of thing you could achieve with, say, a DAMP CLOTH.

And of course everyone who gets hay fever gets it from unclean surfaces rather than pollen in the air.

Oh wait...


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## A3DFU (May 7, 2002)

ScoobyTT said:


> *Dandelion clock - A ticking time bomb of domestic terror*


Pretty picture Scooby; you may want to show it to Gazza. I believe he loves dandelion salad :lol: :lol: :lol:


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## rustyintegrale (Oct 1, 2006)

ScoobyTT said:


> Who buys this shit? [smiley=bomb.gif] :lol: :lol:


Like this shit...










It's all a load of toss.


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## skitty (Apr 1, 2011)

Always wash my hands when using public loos but in order to get out of the said loo you have open the door with the door handle which has been "infected" by god knows how many other people without washing hands before you, so we need automatic doors on loos, then you can eat your bar snacks from the piss infected dishes with clean hands!!


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## Gazzer (Jun 12, 2010)

A3DFU said:


> ScoobyTT said:
> 
> 
> > *Dandelion clock - A ticking time bomb of domestic terror*
> ...


shut it Dani dont start woman lol

scoob i never use any of that crap........rinse under tap and wipe with towel unless hands are greasy, then use sugar as a grit. if immune system cannot handle basic day to day germs then as a race were fooked i guess m8.


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## A3DFU (May 7, 2002)

gazzer1964 said:


> A3DFU said:
> 
> 
> > ScoobyTT said:
> ...


I knew you'd love dandelions :wink: :lol: :lol:

Agree with the rest and for some strange reason a friend and I had a conversation along those lines tonight :roll:


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## newt (May 12, 2002)

I gather that the automatic taps used in American hospitals, are being replaced at great cost back to manual taps, as they have found high levels of legionnaires disease on top of the taps because they never get touched. So this means that touching is good.


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## leenx (Feb 8, 2010)

H G Wells - War Of The Worlds. My understanding what wiped out the aliens was the common cold. Over thousands of years evolution has prevented us from the same - aka being in contact with dirt, dust particles, micro germs and the like. Completely agree with above post - dangerous to make everything 99% germ free (as he sprays Anaesthetic throat spray & blows on snot rag)


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