# People who use the word "Strategic" all



## Stu-Oxfordshire (May 7, 2002)

Just fuck off......

Same goes for "Facilitate" "Ascertain" and other such gittish words


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## Dotti (Mar 9, 2003)

Can you reiterate that please ;D


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## BreTT (Oct 30, 2002)

> Can you reiterate that please Â ;D


He was trying to ascertain whether you could facilitate a strategic discussion on gittish words. Can you help?


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## Dotti (Mar 9, 2003)

> He was trying to ascertain whether you could facilitate a strategic discussion on gittish words. Can you help?


I am afraid I could not elaborate on that, otherwise it might esculate into something I may regret at this time of morning


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

'Client'. Grrrrrr. 'Low hanging fruit'. Kill! 'Vision statement'. Maim.


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## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

Its all Belt and Braces stuff - swings and roundabouts you know.


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## W7 PMC (May 6, 2002)

Horses for courses really  ;D


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

the current one for Our Lot is using term 'Gaining Traction' in business context of 'getting things going'. :

Derisable if they weren't all so dim.


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## SteveS (Oct 20, 2003)

"Singing from the same hymn sheet." 
Aaarrrrgggghhh! and it's even dated ffs.

Hangings too good for the next person that uses that............


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

'Level playing field?' C**nts. 

'Pushing the envelope.' What are you smoking? :-/


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## JohnnyS (Sep 25, 2003)

'wake up and smell the coffee' - what the fuck does that mean?


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## head_ed (Dec 10, 2002)

> 'Client'. Â Grrrrrr. Â


Guilty as charged 

A 'challenge' - never a problem Â 
'I've been _tasked_ to do this'


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## SteveS (Oct 20, 2003)

> A 'challenge' - never a problem


Quite so. If I get just one more impossibly short timescale, limited budget "opportunity".......<bangs head on desk, repeatedly>


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

My wife plays wordwank bingo in some meetings.

They have a list of phrases such as the ones above and the first one to tick off all the ones they have wins.

Other classics are

Let's run it up the flagpole and see who salutes it.

And

synergy or synergistic.

The other game they play is that they are given a phrase that sounds like it COULD be one of the above but is actually even more meaningless and they have to squeeze it into a meeting.


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## StuarTT (May 7, 2002)

> A 'challenge' - never a problem Â


We don't have problems we have "administrative situations".

Managers that say: we need someone to do the strategic thinking on this project!

WTF do you think I do all day! I do that all day to make you look good with your superiors. And when was the last time you thanked me for that? Tosser! [smiley=furious3.gif]


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## WattaMan (Sep 15, 2003)

I swear if I have to sit thru. another meeting about

"turn key products" ... [smiley=rifle.gif]


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## DXN (May 18, 2002)

are you a lock smith? ;D 



> I swear if I have to sit thru. another meeting about
> 
> "turn key products" ... [smiley=rifle.gif]


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## Steve_Mc (May 6, 2002)

"best of breed", "new paradigm", "change champion", "mission critical", "project scope"

What the fuck?!?


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## nutts (May 8, 2002)

I've played similar games ;D You have some phrases like

- An elephant wearing stockings
- Moon landings at sea
- Mash potatoe from a volcano
etc

and you each choose one blindly and the first to bring their phrase into use at a client meeting wins ;D



> My wife plays wordwank bingo in some meetings.
> 
> They have a list of phrases such as the ones above and the first one to tick off all the ones they have wins.
> 
> ...


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## Sim (Mar 7, 2003)

I cannot comprehend your frustration; my strategic thinking time facilitates my forum perusal and enables me to think outside the box. As long as I am functioning with SMART objectives, I consistently meet the project deadlines ;D


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## jam (May 8, 2002)

'effectively' Â thats another one that people put into each sentence about 8 times

i play a game in meetings trying to count up the number of times it's said Â ;D

i found myself using it once so i took myself outside and gave me a good kicking! Â 

cheers

James


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

One od the ones to look out for when a member of the public is inteviewed is actual or actually.

Next time you see some numpty bollox being asked to speak for any length of time, you'll notice it.

There's another one that always crops up, but I can't think of it off the top of my bonce.


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## SteveS (Oct 20, 2003)

y'know. 

That just drives me round the bend, I NEVER hear a word the person says, I'm always waiting for the next y'know. Y'know?


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## StuarTT (May 7, 2002)

> y'know.
> 
> That just drives me round the bend, I NEVER hear a word the person says, I'm always waiting for the next y'know. Y'know?


Similar words being:

"at the end of the day, like, y'know."

With the tone of the voice being raised toward the end of the sentence as though it was a question, but isn't..... :-X


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

'Paradigm shift' WTF 

'Seamless end to end solution'. Yeah right. Try to convince a seasoned data centre manager about that little ditty.


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

ah the old AQI?

Australian Questioning Intonation - as coined by Steven Fry on room 101.

Raising the tome of your voice towards the end of sentence makes it sound like you're asking a question even when you're not and is particularly prevelant in our antipodean cousins.


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

ps So who plays Bullshit Bingo then? It whiles away the interminable meetings...


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## marksovereign (Sep 20, 2003)

ok so what are the rules for bullshit bingo?


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## SteveS (Oct 20, 2003)

I have, but only silently. (no balls where my income is concerned :-[)

Rules are variable but all the versions I have seen use the same formula. You put a bunch of the above numpty phrases in a grid shape on a card for each player (juggled around on each card so there aren't two the same, just like real bingo) and the first one to cross off a line or get them all or whatever you agree shouts bingo in the middle of the meeting.

Use with caution.....


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## vlastan (May 6, 2002)

I am very surprised to see that nobody mentioned "shareholder value" and "customer focus"

The point is that if you are not prepared to use these key worlds mentioned above and before, you won't be going up the corporate ladder.

I was interviewed last month by HR that are suckers for all these buzz words. They did give me the promotion but they also gave to my boss the following feedback:I was too serious and was talking too much!!


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## bluettone (Feb 26, 2003)

If you want to play buzzword bingo, try this useful 'resource':

http://isd.usc.edu/~karl/Bingo/



Marco


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## Andyman (May 6, 2002)

"Strategic objective" and "Tactical objective" are phrases of the month at our place at the moment. Wish someone would explain what the hell it means. ???


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## vlastan (May 6, 2002)

> "Strategic objective" and "Tactical objective" are phrases of the month at our place at the moment. Wish someone would explain what the hell it means. Â ???


If you can't explain them, you are not senior enough. Ask HR to help your personal development and address your strategic allignment with the company's expectations.


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## vagman (Sep 6, 2002)

Lets touch base.....grrrrrrr 
Teleconfrence......grrrrrrr
the big picture.......grrrrrr
rationale..........grrrrrrrr
brainstorming session.....grrrr


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## b3ves (May 6, 2002)

This is where I send people who come up with this [email protected]

http://www.dilbert.com/comics/dilbert/games/career/bin/ms.cgi


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## John C (Jul 5, 2002)

And all the time ones.... Q1 Q2 Q3 Q4 etc, thought that was it until I heard H1 and H2 next it will be T1 T2 and T3 

Bring back Jan to Dec or even Summer Winter etc!


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## moley (May 14, 2002)

Basically, I hate anyone who starts a phrase with basically - if it's that simple, shut the fuck up ;D

Moley


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## SteveS (Oct 20, 2003)

> Basically, I hate anyone who starts a phrase with basically - if it's that simple, shut the fuck up Â ;D
> 
> Moley


Catch myself with that one lately. Must be more careful. ;D


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

> "Strategic objective" and "Tactical objective" are phrases of the month at our place at the moment. Wish someone would explain what the hell it means. Â ???


Change companies immediately. From your statement I can deduce yours is run by know-nothing-fuckwits who will struggle to manage their way out of an NCP car park.


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## Andyman (May 6, 2002)

> Change companies immediately. Â From your statement I can deduce yours is run by know-nothing-fuckwits who will struggle to manage their way out of an NCP car park.


Ahh, I see you've worked there too.


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

> Ahh, I see you've worked there too. Â


I still do mate. ;D


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## cw955 (Apr 8, 2003)

Noted the other links - I use this one http://www.perkigoth.com/home/kermit/st ... shitbingo/


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## Marque (Jun 4, 2003)

I sense an aura of dynamic Team building here...lets capture that...Tarqin & Tabatha pleasure put that up on the white board...


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## Marque (Jun 4, 2003)

Become a cynic, you know it makes sense....


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## hudson (May 18, 2003)

Managed to get 'beefcurtains' in a recent meeting and kept a straight face. ;D

Didn't get the deal though :-X


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