# office Party Politics



## Kell (May 28, 2002)

FROM Delilah Sanderson
Human Resources Director 
TO All employees 
Date November 6 2004 
RE Christmas Party

I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd starting at noon in the private function room in the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We'll have a three piece band playing traditional carols..........after a few drinks, please feel free to sing along. And, don't be surprised if the MD shows up dressed as Santa Claus!

A Christmas tree will be lit at 13:00. Exchange of gifts amongst employees can be done at this time; however, no gift should be over Â£10 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pocket. This gathering is only for employees.

Merry Christmas to you all and your families, Delilah

FROM Delilah Sanderson
Human Resources Director 
TO All employees 
Date November 7 2004 
RE Holiday Party

In no way was yesterdays memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognise that Chanukah is an important holiday which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year. However, from now on we are calling it our "Holiday Party".

The same policy applies to any of our other non Christian employees. There will be no Christmas tree or Christmas Carols sung. We will have other types of music for your entertainment

Happy now?

Happy Holiday to you all. Delilah

FROM Delilah Sanderson
Human Resources Director 
TO All employees 
Date November 8 2004 
RE Holiday Party

Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non drinking table....you didn't sign your name. I'm happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on the table that reads "AA Only" you wouldn't be anonymous any more!!

Forget about the present exchange. No gifts will be allowed as the union official said Â£10 was too much money to spend on their "Comrades" and management consider Â£10 too cheap. So NO GIFT EXCHANGE

FROM Delilah Sanderson
Human Resources Director 
TO All employees 
Date November 8 2004 
RE Holiday Party

MY, what a diverse group we are. I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit furthest away from the dessert buffet and pregnant women table closest to the toilets. Gays will be allowed to sit with each other, lesbians do not have to sit with the gays, each will have their own table. Yes, there will be flower arrangements for the men's table also. To the person asking for permission to cross-dress - NO

We will have booster seats for short arses. Low fat food will be available for those on a diet. As we cannot control the salt used in the food - we suggest those with high blood pressure, taste the food first. There will be fresh fruits as a dessert for diabetics, but the restaurant cannot supply "No Sugar" desserts. Sorry

Did I miss anything ?!?!?!?

FROM Delilah Sanderson
Slave Traders Director 
TO All Shit-head employees 
Date November 9 2004 
RE The Phucking Holiday Party

Vegetarian pricks, I've had it with you people. The party STAYS at the Grill House, like it or not. Sit at the table furthest from the â€œgrill of death" as you put it and you'll get your blasted salad bar with organic tomatoes. But listen....tomatoes have feelings as well you know. They scream when you cut them. Oh yes. I've heard them scream. I can hear them screaming NOW.

Have a rotten holiday

FROM John Parker
Acting Human Resources Director 
TO All employees 
Date November 10 2004 
RE Holiday Party

I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Delilah Sanderson a speedy recovery and I'll forward your cards to her.

In the meantime, the management have decided to cancel our Holiday Party and instead give everyone the afternoon of December 23 off with full pay

Happy Holidays


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## malTTeezer (Nov 27, 2003)

that ain't no joke Kell that's the way of the office non party now :x


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## T3RBO (Dec 9, 2003)

So true... this year my work had a 'winter festival' which included no xmas songs, carols or even decorations 

What is this world coming to?


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