# Why do all the birds in Basingstoke ...



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

...look fucking pig ugly?

I mean, I'm no oil painting but FFS look at the state of some of these:










"Debsneedscoffee"? Yeah, and Prozacneeds50pints just to look at you.










33yrs old? Yeah right love. And what was your previous name ...Dave?










"Lushbunny"? :lol: More like "Bunnyboiler"! :?










And this one's such a fucking pikey that she's stuck a photo of a photo on the site. :roll:

Thank fuck I haven't 'invested' 60 quid on finding my ideal partner! :?


----------



## skiwhiz (Feb 17, 2008)

Should have gone to spec savers   

or burger king drive thru :lol: :lol: :lol:


----------



## John C (Jul 5, 2002)

GSOH?


----------



## taylormade-tt (May 14, 2007)

I am not picky but....... :?

I would rather be single and put my time into developing a huge right forearm :roll: :lol:

Tom.


----------



## Apaddler (Nov 19, 2008)

I used to drive around delivering mineral water out the back of a truck/van all summer, I went all over the midlands. I found that some towns are stuffed to the gills with hotties, and others the lasses all look like butcher's wives (no offence to any butchers on here!). Basingstoke must be a butcher's town.
My top 5? In no order, Nottingham, Leamington & Warwick, Cannock, Stratford-Upon-Avon, Shrewsbury.
Worst? Walsall, Wolverhampton, Coventry, Leicester, Kidderminster.

I didn't ever get as far as the home counties so can't offer any more practical advice, but if I had to put money on it I'd say Egham, Windsor, Eton should offer some improvement?


----------



## jammyd (Oct 11, 2008)

Neil... Don't use the t'internet for a quick shag! but then we can't be choosy can we lol!

For hot birds head to Cheltenham, no idea why, but even the dole dwellers look hot!


----------



## YELLOW_TT (Feb 25, 2004)

They all look like stunners to me


----------



## YELLOW_TT (Feb 25, 2004)

YELLOW_TT said:


> They all look like stunners to me


Hang on just had a thought it is 23:45 and I have had over half a bottle of vodka I better have another look in the morning after full English [smiley=cheers.gif] [smiley=cheers.gif] [smiley=cheers.gif] :idea:


----------



## SaintScoTT (Jun 27, 2008)

thats just tragic. you have my deepest sympathies.

I went windowshopping on RSVP like a week ago (its an online dating website here in oz) and found some absolute stunners. sure, they were few and far between, but they're out there! somewhere..


----------



## YELLOW_TT (Feb 25, 2004)

now the beer goggles are off it has all become clear far far to clear :lol: :wink:


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

:lol: You guys crack me up.

See, how am I supposed to find my dream women with munters like that on offer?

I might have to drive down to the McDonalds drive thru (no BK drive thru here!), and see if the old Golf GTi swings me a date!


----------



## mighTy Tee (Jul 10, 2002)

Word has got out that you are available and all the ***** have moved to Basingstoke desperate to loose their (claimed) virginity

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

You didn't tell me you were moving to Basingstoke Dick! :-*

I was good in my prime. I did manage to convert a vegetarian **** into a meat eater! :wink:


----------



## jammyd (Oct 11, 2008)

Private Prozac said:


> You didn't tell me you were moving to Basingstoke Dick! :-*
> 
> I was good in my prime. I did manage to convert a vegetarian **** into a meat eater! :wink:


SHame she only ate the meat off the plate, and would not munch your Sausage! :lol:


----------



## Wallsendmag (Feb 12, 2004)

Private Prozac said:


> You didn't tell me you were moving to Basingstoke Dick! :-*
> 
> I was good in my prime. I did manage to convert a vegetarian **** into a meat eater! :wink:


You live in Basingstoke ? I have relatives there , but we don't talk about them


----------



## CamV6 (Oct 26, 2003)

Jeez, those birds, or at least the concept of romance with any of them are the best advert I've ever seen for wanking (not in relation to them directly or indirectly, of course) [smiley=sick2.gif]


----------



## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

I think we should see your profile photograph


----------



## sporTTyminx (Mar 5, 2009)

Lisa. said:


> I think we should see your profile photograph


Yes, what a marvellous idea!


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

sporTTyminx said:


> Yes, what a marvellous idea!


_You_ can shutup! :wink:

Seperate negotiations are going on over that particular issue.

And Lisa, why do you want a pic. You met me at the NYEE meet a couple of years ago outside Harrods! And yes, I am still as gorgeous and worth dumping Tim for!


----------



## sporTTyminx (Mar 5, 2009)

Private Prozac said:


> sporTTyminx said:
> 
> 
> > Yes, what a marvellous idea!
> ...


*gasp*
How could you? How could you disclose our private information on here??


----------



## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

Private Prozac said:


> sporTTyminx said:
> 
> 
> > Yes, what a marvellous idea!
> ...


We've met? I don't remember you  but Tim does and says he'll dump me for you.

I hadn't realised you were once 260bhp and TT2BMW, I can remember that I quite liked TT2BMW, and Private Prozac is cool too, but I seem to recall 260BHP was a bit of a Basingstoke :roll:


----------



## Dash (Oct 5, 2008)

It definitely differs from town-to-town. I grew up in one city, and there were pretty girls, and not so pretty girls. I finally left for college in another town, when I realised they were all pretty compared to the next town.

I found it quite a shock to see so many ugly girls existed.


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Lisa. said:


> We've met? I don't remember you  but Tim does and says he'll dump me for you.
> 
> I hadn't realised you were once 260bhp and TT2BMW, I can remember that I quite liked TT2BMW, and Private Prozac is cool too, but I seem to recall 260BHP was a bit of a Basingstoke :roll:


 :lol: I knew as soon as I met Tim that there was an instant chemistry and spark there. :-*

260BHP _was_ a bit of a 'Basingstoke'. May he rest in peace.


----------



## jammyd (Oct 11, 2008)

There's a few decent ones in Watford today 

Out on my lunch and I saw some nice ermmmm TTiTTies 

You have just got to love it when the sun comes out and the clothes come off


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Indeed mate. Those moobs are a sight for sore eyes aren't they! :wink:


----------



## sporTTyminx (Mar 5, 2009)

Mmmm tasty.


----------



## hooting_owl (Sep 3, 2008)

pound of liver in a jam jar. you can't go wrong....


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Thanks mate. Good idea. It might just come to that! :?


----------



## jammyd (Oct 11, 2008)

I will be coming past Basingstoke in a bit on my way to Hungerford, do you want to go out for a beer?

Once the decent ones take a look at me, I am sure they will be all over you... :lol: :lol: :lol:


----------



## sporTTyminx (Mar 5, 2009)

jammyd...

Dont be putting yourself down, unless that is a pic of your moobs above??


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

jammyd said:


> I will be coming past Basingstoke in a bit on my way to Hungerford, do you want to go out for a beer?


Do you mean today 'in a bit' or in a few days 'in a bit'?


----------



## Kell (May 28, 2002)

40-ish......................49.

Adventurous.............Slept with everyone.

Athletic....................No breasts.

Average looking.........Moooo.

Beautiful....................Pathological liar.

Emotionally Secure.....On medication.

Feminist.....................Fat.

Free spirit...................Junkie.

Friendship first.............Former slut.

New-Age.....................Body hair in the wrong places.

Old-fashioned...............No BJs.

Open-minded................Desperate.

Outgoing.......................Loud and Embarrassing.

Professional...................Bitch.

Voluptuous.....................Very Fat.

Large frame....................Hugely Fat.

Wants Soul mate............Stalker.


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Yep. Any one of the above will be fine thanks.


----------



## jammyd (Oct 11, 2008)

Private Prozac said:


> jammyd said:
> 
> 
> > I will be coming past Basingstoke in a bit on my way to Hungerford, do you want to go out for a beer?
> ...


Passed by at about 4pm last night!

I am due in Basingstoke in a few weeks I will let you know when and we can go on the pull... (Don't tell the misses :lol: )


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

jammyd said:


> I am due in Basingstoke in a few weeks I will let you know when and we can go on the pull... (Don't tell the misses :lol: )


I wont.  Oh, I see ....you mean your Mrs! :lol:

Couldn't do me a favour and pick up sporty en-route could ya mate?


----------



## sporTTyminx (Mar 5, 2009)

I'd love to Private Prozac, but i dont have a passport so am allowed no further south than Leeds.


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

That's probably a good thing. Keeps the riff raff out! :wink:


----------



## sporTTyminx (Mar 5, 2009)




----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

How very rude. Call yourself a lady? My point entirely. Don't want 'your sort' down here lowering our house prices even more thank you. :-*


----------



## sporTTyminx (Mar 5, 2009)

I never said i was a lady. I am a minx


----------



## jammyd (Oct 11, 2008)

sporTTyminx said:


> I never said i was a lady. I am a minx


I am on my way up north again soon too... shall I go pick up some prozac and drop it off in Northumberland?


----------



## sporTTyminx (Mar 5, 2009)

Yes please!


----------



## jammyd (Oct 11, 2008)

sporTTyminx said:


> Yes please!


Your a dirty minx... Rusty, Prozac next you will want some jammydodger


----------



## sporTTyminx (Mar 5, 2009)

:wink:

Go on then, i love a jammydodger!


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

You wouldn't want his sporTTy. He's been on here so long it's gone stale!! :lol:


----------



## jammyd (Oct 11, 2008)

Private Prozac said:


> You wouldn't want his sporTTy. He's been on here so long it's gone stale!! :lol:


At least I am getting some... not ending up looking for birds in Basingstoke!!!! Please remember who was desperate enough to think that this...










might be a go-er!!! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Arse. The work firewall's blocked the pic.

Where should I look for birds then oh great sex master? Hmmm, let's think ...live in Basingstoke, single, oh I know I'll look in Glasgow. You prize nobber. :wink:


----------



## sporTTyminx (Mar 5, 2009)

Where did you get that picture of me??


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Arse x 2.

What is the picture of sporTTy? Is it one of the ones I posted at the start?


----------



## sporTTyminx (Mar 5, 2009)

Yep, it's the lushbunny one.

Did you say she was a goer? Think you referred to her as bunnyboiler!


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Oh, that one.

No I bloody didn't. Obviously Jammy's going blind. Wonder what's causing that ...


----------



## Wallsendmag (Feb 12, 2004)

Private Prozac said:


> Where should I look for birds then oh great sex master? Hmmm, let's think ...live in Basingstoke, single, oh I know I'll look in Glasgow. You prize nobber. :wink:


Prudhoe would seem to be a good bet , want a cheap train ticket ? :wink:


----------



## vlastan (May 6, 2002)

Your allegations are wrong. Basingstoke has top girls around.

Just go out to the right places to see them.

I do remember you live in Popley, then perhaps that is where these women come from. Come over to Chineham mate...to see some stunners!!


----------



## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Popley? *POPLEY?* Fuck off V. :x

If I lived in Popley then I'd expect munters but I don't. HW mate. So would expect some decent totty in my neck of the woods. Chineham's nice too. Great pub down there.


----------

