# Forum Virtual Secret Santa...



## Kell (May 28, 2002)

This could be quite good fun if it takes off.

I'll collate all the people that want to play and divvy them up and give you back the name of hte person you're 'buying' for.

I say 'buying' as it obviously won't be possible to exchange gifts, so we get a virtual present for that person instead. With a Â£10 maximum, we scour the internet for a suitable gift, and post a picture and a link to the item on a pre-arranged day - saying who it's for and why you 'bought' it.

If I say a week from today for everyone that wants to play before I accept no new people and let those that are playing know who they're buying for, it should give you all plenty of time to think of something suitable.

Then you have two weeks and on Thursday 22nd, all is revelaed.

Any takers?

(I'll update this list as we go along.)

*Me
Ronin
NaughTTy
GenocidalDuck
GW1970
Nando
phodge
gizmo750
Toshiba
jampott
ratty
The Silver Surfer
TTotal
BamTT
jdn
Multiprocess
Lisa
saint
slg
kingcutter
nutts
T7
kctt
jacTT225
auditt260bhp
wallsendmag
hev
sssgucci
sim
thehornster
*


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## ronin (Sep 6, 2003)

Sounds good - count me in!


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## genocidalduck (May 19, 2005)

Can i play


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## GW1970 (Jul 4, 2005)

Ok - I'm in


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## NaughTTy (Jul 9, 2003)

Yes please Christmas Kell


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## Nando (Feb 5, 2004)

this could be funny - stick me down


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## phodge (Sep 1, 2002)

That sounds like fun - can I join?


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## Gizmo750 (Sep 16, 2004)

Sounds fun, sign me up - ho ho ho!


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## Toshiba (Jul 8, 2004)

bar humbug - im in.


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## jampott (Sep 6, 2003)

add me in too

we're doing one at work from elfster.com


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## ratty (May 18, 2004)

Count me in Santa [smiley=santa.gif]


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## The Silver Surfer (May 14, 2002)

The Recruiting Department of my employer do the Secret Santa thing every year, and I also got involved when I was on a secondment there a couple of years ago. :lol:

Count me in for this one Kell.


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## TTotal (Aug 12, 2002)

The more pressies the better !

Yes please Santa


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## BAMTT (Feb 22, 2004)

Me to pls


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## jdn (Aug 26, 2002)

Why not - count me in also.


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## Multiprocess (Aug 9, 2004)

Me too!!


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## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

yeah me too!


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## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

me


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## NaughTTy (Jul 9, 2003)

One question though Kell - How is it still going to be a "Secret" Santa when we have to post our own links? (or will we all send you the links and reasons for you to post for each person?)

....or have I mis-read it and that's what you meant anyway :roll:


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## TTotal (Aug 12, 2002)

SShhh Paul, thats a secret


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

Nope, you're technically correct Paul.

It will remain 'secret' UNTIL you post your links.

Unless, I do what you said, but that would mean I can't play. 

Alternatively - we could all create a log in purely to post under for the secret bit... :twisted:


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## slg (May 6, 2005)

me aswell


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## NaughTTy (Jul 9, 2003)

Kell said:


> Nope, you're technically correct Paul.
> 
> It will remain 'secret' UNTIL you post your links.
> 
> ...


You could post yours to me and I'll post yours....but then everyone would know that it was from you anyway so that's that idea down the pan [smiley=freak.gif]

Ummm.........


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## kingcutter (Aug 1, 2003)

Me please.


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## nutts (May 8, 2002)

Count me and Lou in too


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## t7 (Nov 2, 2002)

- top idea! If I like my secret santa gift I'll have to buy it for myself :wink:

Lou


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## kctt (Nov 10, 2002)

count me in too please


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## John C (Jul 5, 2002)

go on then, me too!


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## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Yes please Kell.


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## Wallsendmag (Feb 12, 2004)

I suppose on this occasion under the circumstances.....count me in it'll give me someting to do to forget about football :?


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## Hev (Feb 26, 2005)

Can I play too?










Hev x


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

[smiley=santa.gif] ooh - it's getting exciting now... [smiley=santa.gif]


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

Just a bump in case anyone missed it.


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## Sim (Mar 7, 2003)

Thanks because I missed it 

Count me in!


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## phodge (Sep 1, 2002)

Kell, are we finding out today who we're 'buying' for? :?:


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## sssgucci (Nov 20, 2004)

Can I play plz?


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

two more added.

I'll pm everybody with their respective 'victim' tomorrow.

Just thought though, I'm going to have to tell someone to buy something for me.


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## Gizmo750 (Sep 16, 2004)

Kell,

Send that message blind-folded, then it will be a surprise!


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## thehornster (Apr 29, 2005)

Is it to late to add me :? I thought i'd already done it


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

thehornster said:


> Is it to late to add me :? I thought i'd already done it


added...


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## t7 (Nov 2, 2002)

Already been thinking about what to get - Â£10 isnt enough.... :roll:


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## ToonToon (Dec 7, 2005)

Kell said:


> two more added.
> 
> I'll pm everybody with their respective 'victim' tomorrow.
> 
> Just thought though, I'm going to have to tell someone to buy something for me.


Can you send it to me instead of wallsendmag bit of a balls up on my behalf updating my email address


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

ToonToon said:


> Kell said:
> 
> 
> > two more added.
> ...


No probs...


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## TTotal (Aug 12, 2002)

I couldnt wait - its so exciting !  Well mine was easy, I have bought a pressy for Paul AKA naughTTy,

Anyone who knows him will agree on this choice!

$14.95 plus post was my amount which is near to the Â£10 limit...

Happy Family Christmas Paul to you and your little family, from John and Helen XXX


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

OK - I've just sent PMs to everybody that said yes.

If you dhaven't got your pm, then let me know and I'll keep make sure you find out who you're buying for.

Remember, Thursday 22nd, you have to post what you're buying and who's it for (with a link to the site) and it must cost about a tenner.

By that I mean between Â£8-ish and Â£12-ish.


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## nutts (May 8, 2002)

Kell said:


> Remember, Thursday 22nd, you have to *post* what you're buying and who's it for (with a link to the site) and it must cost about a tenner.
> 
> By that I mean between Â£8-ish and Â£12-ish.


Is that too late for Xmas? and does the Â£8 to Â£12 include p&p?


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

Are you extracting the michael?

You post your item in this thread (or another one I start...)

That's why it's a *virtual* secret santa...


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## TTotal (Aug 12, 2002)

Doh Doh Doh Doh :lol:


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## Sim (Mar 7, 2003)

Whoops I was early - now removed - hope he did not see it


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## NaughTTy (Jul 9, 2003)

TTotal said:


> I couldnt wait - its so exciting !  Well mine was easy, I have bought a pressy for Paul AKA naughTTy,
> 
> Anyone who knows him will agree on this choice!
> 
> ...


I don't know what to say John - I'm really touched  (and I don't care if it's early - it makes Christmas last a little bit longer.  )

For some reason my youngest thinks this is really funny - she says she hopes you got extra large 'cos of all the turkey I'm going to eat! :roll: :lol:

Thanks Mate  Happy Christmas to you and Helen too xx


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## nutts (May 8, 2002)

Kell said:


> Are you extracting the michael?
> 
> You post your item in this thread (or another one I start...)
> 
> That's why it's a *virtual* secret santa...


 :wink:


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## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

I really do pitty someone!!!


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## GW1970 (Jul 4, 2005)

Do we post our 'virtual presents' on this thread?? or send you (Kell) a PM?

Just wondering because if we post here, our recipient will know who their pressie is from :? The way I've always played secret santa at work (and part of the fun) is that it's anonymous.


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## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

I think we should pm Kell and then he can copy and paste onto this thread. Otherwise I'm FCUKed and might get my head kicked in at the next meet!!


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## BAMTT (Feb 22, 2004)

Kell said:


> I say 'buying' as it obviously won't be possible to exchange gifts, so we get a virtual present for that person instead. With a Â£10 maximum, we scour the internet for a suitable gift, and post a picture and a link to the item on a pre-arranged day - saying who it's for and why you 'bought' it.
> 
> 
> > Although i thought we were meant to be telling each the above :? , which makes it not so secret :wink:


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## genocidalduck (May 19, 2005)

THink we should pm kell who we have bought for and the link then he can post the whole thing..........I for one dont want the person i bought for knowing who bought them a tacky piece of wotsit


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## ratty (May 18, 2004)

genocidalduck said:


> THink we should pm kell who we have bought for and the link then he can post the whole thing..........I for one dont want the person i bought for knowing who bought them a tacky piece of wotsit


Damm, that's what I was going to send you to go with that tacky coloured car....


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## GW1970 (Jul 4, 2005)

genocidalduck said:


> THink we should pm kell who we have bought for and the link then he can post the whole thing..........I for one dont want the person i bought for knowing who bought them a tacky piece of wotsit


seconded [smiley=thumbsup.gif]


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

And then I'll tell everyone who it was from... :twisted:

Serioulsy though, I think if you do do that, I'm going to get loads of PMs asking who it was. And being the nice guy that I am I'm not sure whether I'll protect you or let them know.

So, no. Post it yourselves. 8)


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## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Ya lazy git! :wink:


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

auditt260bhp said:


> Ya lazy git! :wink:


Of course, that's another reason.


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## GW1970 (Jul 4, 2005)

So could we rename this : "Virtual present buying" as they isn't anything secret about it! :?


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## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Well, it's now officially Thursday 22nd December and so here goes my reveal:

Merry Christmas jdn










Need to get to an itch in an intimate spot discreetly? The Gentleman's Ball Scratcher is just what you need! 
When you get an itch in that most awkward of spots, what's a man to do? The only problem is that while fellow blokes understand the need to have a good old scratch sometimes, the female of the species tend to be disgusted for some unknown reason. But now you don't have to suffer in silence. The Gentleman's Ball Scratcher is the sophisticated solution to this irritating issue.

Silver plated and crafted in the shape of a delicate female hand, the Ball Scratcher is ideal for getting to those hard to reach places. Perfect for the busy make executive, it comes in a lined presentation box, which colleagues will assume holds a fancy pen or letter opener. Be discreet enough, and no one will notice where the hand is heading...

With a nine inch handle and the benefit of five fingers (oo-er missus), the Gentleman's Ball Scratcher is guaranteed to provide the relief you need at difficult moments. Trust us, you'll wonder how you ever lived without it. The perfect tongue-in-cheek gift for the man who has everything (including an itch).

Dishwasher safe and stain resistant.

Gentleman's Ball Scratcher
Boys Stuff Price: Â£7.95

And Â£2.05 left for the wrapping paper!!


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## genocidalduck (May 19, 2005)

Doh was hoping for it to stay a secret ohwell here goes

This is For you Kctt.

Sorry don't know you....So did some research and someone told me you have greyhounds, so this is the only thing i could come up with that was cheap 

Enjoy!

http://www.cafepress.com/shop/dogs/browse/store/saddogshirts.17903563

I hope you have got a Greyhound or its even more pointless than it actually is


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## GW1970 (Jul 4, 2005)

Ok so now we're all out in the open here goes...

First off Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to jacTT225!! 

*ahem* Ah dunnae kinn ye. Ah am frae englain. Ah hope ye can kin thes laddy? Ah worked it ye ur frae scotalnd an' 'at ye ur bald.

so:










from sillyjokes.co.uk Â£5.95 + p&p

"They may take our freedom but they will never take our Special Brew"
Also available:
Ginger Beard

"Elasticated tartan hat with bobble and sewn in ginger hair, Special Brew not included."


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## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

^ Well there was no surprise there!!


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## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

Phodge,

It will always be difficult to buy for someone you've never met and don't know interests etc - so I had a choice - either play safe or buy cack.....

.... I played safe!! :?

http://order.next.co.uk/page.asp?b=X36&p=274&o=1

Item - 968-661-X36

Â£9.99

Something that will surely go with a Christmas Outfit.



phodge said:


> I always like jewellery. Doesn't have to be expensive - just look expensive. Something small and discreet can often look more classy than something loud and brash.


My very safe bet and even more boring than above -



phodge said:


> One of those funny Â£10 note voucher things that she can spend in any shop she likes on something that she wants??


In the end it's the thought that counts rather than the material value of a gift - so...

Merry Christmas

sa|nta

(Jae shame you re-enabled the wrong account)


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## kctt (Nov 10, 2002)

genocidalduck said:


> Doh was hoping for it to stay a secret ohwell here goes
> 
> This is For you Kctt.
> 
> ...


cheap..........cheap is that any excuse and how you treat all women :wink: 
I'm sure we'll find a use for it, if I put any dog treats in it it will be destroyed by the mad puppy (who isn't actually a grey but a cross with one) so will just stick it in a draw and forget about it okay! :roll:

Hey I'm just joking! Seasons greeting and many festive thanks  
At least you didn't think it funny to get be a bet or something :-*


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## slg (May 6, 2005)

I had Toshiba to "buy" something for. Without knowing anything about you other than you have two TT's (what else could you possibly need?) I noticed that you are a reality TV fan :roll: :wink:

Therefore I found these for you:

Big Brother 3 - Â£4.99









I'm a Celebrity - Â£3.00









Left something over for wrapping paper and a box of mint matchmakers from the local Shell garage










Have a good Christmas


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## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

genocidalduck said:


> http://www.cafepress.com/shop/dogs/browse/store/saddogshirts.17903563


Cheat!

xe.com Universal Currency Converter Â® Results 
Live mid-market rates as of 2005.12.22 08:31:35 UTC. 
21.99 USD United States Dollars = *12.6219 GBP* United Kingdom Pounds

1 USD = 0.573982 GBP 1 GBP = 1.74221 USD

:roll:


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## phodge (Sep 1, 2002)

Hello Wallsendmag II and Happy Christmas!

As previously stated, it 's very difficult to buy a present for someone you don't know - especially when they keep changing their identity! Have you got something to hide ?? :wink:

Anyway, here goes...

http://www.paramountzone.com/survival.htm

I don't know how anyone could get through life without it!

Penny Hodge.


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## phodge (Sep 1, 2002)

Hello Sa|nt,

Thankyou very much for your present, you have very good taste! I have just the outfit to go with that necklace - in fact I might even go out and buy it myself!

Happy Christmas to you all,
Penny.


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## Nando (Feb 5, 2004)

This one goes out to Neil â€" â€œauditt260bhpâ€.
Of late, I think you have spent more time in the Flame Room than anywhere else, soâ€¦â€¦â€¦ I went cheap (a shade under Â£8), tacky, tasteless, useless with mild comedy value.










> When people or stubborn inanimate objects start to get on your nerves, you need something to get the anger off your chest. Keeping a full-sized punch bag close to hand is not always possible (unfortunately), so here are a couple of miniature alternatives. Theyâ€™re highly offensive and deeply satisfying - great, in other words, for letting out your aggression in a controlled manner without having to throw things around the room.
> The mini one is just 13cm or so high, and the large one is 33cm high. They both have tenacious rubber-cupped feet, and will stick to anything youâ€™re prepared to lick (though you may prefer to lick the feet rather than what youâ€™re sticking it to). Simply flick the bag and it will swing just like a regular punch bag and utter one of a random selection of profane expletives. It gives you the chance to let rip with a healthy bout of swearing without taking the direct blame. Deeply childish of course, but truly satisfying in the way that only something this tacky can be.
> Foul-mouthed punch-bags
> Suckered feet
> ...


Wishing you a Merry Christmas and a prosperous New Year.
Cheers
Ryan


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## ratty (May 18, 2004)

*Hello thehornster and very happy Christmas*

For the man that has everthing but never the less sometimes find himself short! (if you recall your now famous thread) [smiley=jester.gif]

I decided this present would be the answer to your problem:

http://www.gogo-gadgets.co.uk/index.asp ... oductid=91

http://www.********.co.uk/gallery/ratty/talkingtp.jpg

*The toilet roll holder that actually speaks! *

Surprise your family and friends with an unexpected bathroom message - turns an ordinary trip to the bathroom into a laugh filled surprise they'll never forget. Talking Toilet Paper is a unique new product that allows you to record (and re-record) a message, music or sound and then have it automatically play back. The recording device is built into a spindle that fits inside a roll of toilet paper (and fits all holders and toilet paper rolls) so that every time the toilet paper "rolls," the recording is played! 
Simply turn on the unit and press the record button and record up to 6 seconds of sound. The device uses special technology to sense movement of the spindle, which automatically plays back the recording every time the unit

http://www.********.co.uk/gallery/ratty/toiletpaper.gif

All you have to do is leave yourself a message *PLEASE TOP ME UP I AM RUNNING LOW* [smiley=idea.gif]

http://www.********.co.uk/gallery/ratty/GR6000%20-%20Envirotex%20Toilet%20Rolls%20(white).jpg

Enjoy and have very merry Christmas and I will meet you on the 30th.

John

[smiley=sunny.gif]


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## BAMTT (Feb 22, 2004)

This is for Kell,

Who once again i don't personally, although from his posts he does seem to have a darker sense of humour at times :twisted: and baldness !! it's Â£5.70 on Amazon, as for the change thats going on Optimax :lol:










Baldies

An excerpt from the write up



> Sick And Wrong.
> 
> A self-proclaimed game of "demented action for people who think," this one has now officially supplanted Total Distortion as the single weirdest game I have ever played. As the god/commander/ editor :wink: of the Baldies, it's your job to oversee every aspect of their ongoing war with their Hairy enemies (presumably, the conflict is aesthetic in nature). The goal here is nothing less than genocide (with a good deal of cruelty to animals thrown in for good measure).


Full write up here

Rgds

Tony


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## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Ryan - Fan-fooking-tastic. :lol:

Thanks very much mate. Much appreciated. Actually, I wouldn't mind getting one so where's it from?

Happy Christmas to you and yours.

Neil.


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## TTotal (Aug 12, 2002)

TTotal said:


> I couldnt wait - its so exciting !  Well mine was easy, I have bought a pressy for Paul AKA naughTTy,
> 
> Anyone who knows him will agree on this choice!
> 
> ...


As I was so premature I wrapped up this Tee shirt again..here you are Paul (Pretend you havent seen it yet) :roll:


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## thehornster (Apr 29, 2005)

Firstly i'd like to thank ratty for my gift!! Youve saved me many a sock now pal :lol: :lol:

Anyway my secret santa was *Kingcutter*.Ive heard your a hairdresser so heres my choice of gift.










http://www.pixiedustgifts.com/gifts/cat ... 3-22-0.php

Survival Kit for Hairdressers
Just the thing for the hairdresser in your life! This adorable 3in metal slip cover tin is filled with candy and other items guaranteed to make them smile. A great, unique gift for anybody who knows a hairdresser who could use a special gift. A list of the contents is printed on the outside of the tin and says:

Payday: For the tip you didn't receive.
Cotton Ball: To cushion all the standing you do.
Snickers: To remind you to keep your sense of humor.
LifeSaver: To remind you of the many times you've been one.
Starburst: For a "burst" of energy near the end of the day.
Button: Because sometimes you have to "button your lip".
Tootsie Roll: To help complaints "roll" off your back.
String: For when you get to the end of your rope.
Rubber Band: To remind you to stay flexible.
Lollipop: To help you lick your problems.

$15.00

And to make up the rest of the money!
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASI ... 28-5591814










Merry Christmas!!! If you dont like the gifts i still have the receipts :roll: 

All the best

John [smiley=devil.gif]


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## Nando (Feb 5, 2004)

auditt260bhp said:


> Ryan - Fan-fooking-tastic. :lol:
> Thanks very much mate. Much appreciated. Actually, I wouldn't mind getting one so where's it from?
> Happy Christmas to you and yours.
> Neil.


http://www.iwantoneofthose.com/search.do?productCode=SWEPUNVAR
Looks to be a bit more expensive in the UK but what the heck. It's Christmas...  
Cheers
Ryan


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## NaughTTy (Jul 9, 2003)

Happy Christmas to Lou (t7)

Well, I have to confess I couldn't make up my mind for you so I've got to give you a choice.......







(yes, it's probably cheating but it is Christmas so who cares  )

1. Since you're away on business so much and away from Mark I thought I'd give you something to ease the stress while you're on your own........yes - your very own "Orgasmatron" ........

No - it's not what you think :wink: .......









.......It's actually a head massager :roll:









If you haven't already tried one, you really should:



> The sensation you get is unbelievable... tingling up and down the spine, goosebumps all over your body... and best of all the Orgasmatron helps you forget all the stresses and strains of the day. Buy one of these and youâ€™ll never want to leave your home again!


OK maybe that does sound a bit iffy :roll:

Â£9.99 Delivered from play.com

Alternatively, If that doesn't float your festive boat then how about this:

2. My main memory from being in your house is gadgets....especially in the kitchen....so how about this little labour saving device..

Whirlpool Mug











> Completely pointless, but well good fun! It's your own mini-whirlpool in a nice controlled environment! Mixes milkshakes perfectly... it's cool - every household should have one. I don't know how I survived without my Whirlpool Mug!!
> Dave O
> - Dorset


Â£9.99 from iwantoneofthose.com

I nearly got you a "Hide your vibe pillow" but decided it was pretty inappropriate :roll:  :lol:

Have a very happy Christmas Lou (and Mark) and everyone else on here too.









NaughTTy Paul :-*


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## John C (Jul 5, 2002)

BAMTT - Or Tony to be precise!

Ho Ho Ho - Merry Christmas!

Well with over 1200 posts you do indeed spend lots of time at your PC, so what better to keep you smiling and relaxed than your very own USB massager!










Here it is shown on a neck - AYE RIGHT LIKE THAT'S WHERE HE IS GOING TO PUT IT!!!!












Trite marketing speak said:


> Where's that Amazonian Swede (if that isn't oxymoronic) when you need 'em. No matter, as we can't all have personal masseurs immediately to hand, we need a solution to relieve all those aches and pains we get sitting behind (or more probably in-front of) our computers all day.
> 
> Enter the USB Massager. Simply plug this noduled (made up word) massage disc into your nearest USB port and press it into sore areas... It has a muscle softening massage speed of 3600rpm and a 1.8m cable to reach the parts other USB massagers cannot reach. Sitting on it is a slightly alarming treat for some, and it's particularly wonderful on your shoulders and the soles of your feet.
> 
> ...


Cost Â£10.99 but in the true spirit of a Scotsman I phoned the company, told them I was tight and could only spend Â£10. They said 'well the price is Â£10.99. I then replied that I only wanted it virtually to which they got confused and I hoodwinked them into virtually discounting it to Â£10 on the strength that they would not sell me it for that price.

(think they thought I was drunk)

Have a good one!

John


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## NaughTTy (Jul 9, 2003)

TTotal said:


> TTotal said:
> 
> 
> > I couldnt wait - its so exciting !  Well mine was easy, I have bought a pressy for Paul AKA naughTTy,
> ...





> I don't know what to say John - I'm really touched
> 
> For some reason my youngest thinks this is really funny - she says she hopes you got extra large 'cos of all the turkey I'm going to eat!
> 
> Thanks mate and Happy Christmas to you and Helen too xx


 :wink:


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## John C (Jul 5, 2002)

@GW1970 - Shucks thanks!

Been wearing it all morning and the red hair sets off my eyes a treat! :wink:

I was a bit dissapointed though to paste 'sillyjoke' across my chest a la your picture and to my dismay my entire team agreed with the 'phrase' - :evil:  :wink: :lol:


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## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

Is that red hair with the red eyes [smiley=cheers.gif]


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## BAMTT (Feb 22, 2004)

Thks John very kind of you !

Now what else could i use this for :lol: :lol:










And a Merry Christmas to you all


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## Gizmo750 (Sep 16, 2004)

Righto, this one is for *HEV*

Again, its difficult to buy for someone that you haven't met and don't really know but have a little research the thing that seems most obvious is her love for "smilies" so:

http://www.cafepress.com/raven1.17767343










Had I known you a little better I may have opted for this combo:


















*Happy Christmas *


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## Mrs Wallsendmag (Dec 13, 2005)

From me to Multiprocess ,because everyone needs a little culture in their life 








Shirt of Legends: The Story of Newcastle United's No.9 Heroes -


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## Mrs Wallsendmag (Dec 13, 2005)

phodge said:


> Hello Wallsendmag II and Happy Christmas!
> 
> As previously stated, it 's very difficult to buy a present for someone you don't know - especially when they keep changing their identity! Have you got something to hide ?? :wink:
> 
> ...


Thanks for that iit'll come in handy at work for all those daft questionslike,"what do I do if...."


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## t7 (Nov 2, 2002)

NaughTTy Paul - thank you so much - I would probably chose the Orgasmatron :lol: (cue dodgy one liner e.g. "what girl wouldn't?") even though it reminds me a little of War of the Worlds . Have a great Christmas with your family :-*

My santa gift is for The Silver Surfer who sadly I have never met (despite debating the merits of a Scottish annual meet with him many moons ago when he still had a TT). After extensive research :wink: I have uncovered the following facts about this elusive individual - reportedly known to select forum members north of the border. Oh and I thought his real name was Ali but I guess superheroes have to use psuedonyms on web forums 8) .



> Norrin Radd, former herald of the mega-tyrant Galactus, offered his life to protect his native planet, placing him in the service of Galactus as a silver suited sentinal. As a galaxy cruising protector endowed with superhuman strength, he is able to control and direct cosmic energies, with enough force to destroy a city. After visiting Earth, the Surfer finally betrayed Galactus and refused to supply his world-devouring appetite. His punishment was confinement to earth - but he escaped and currently soars the starways as a universal protector.


Clearly it is pretty difficult to chose a gift for someone with superhuman strength and the ability to destroy cities... but I understand in his superhero lair he is lacking one important piece of gadgetry....










So now in addition to the outside temperature (to the nearest 0.1 deg C) you can measure wind direction and speed and check for any rain fall (does it rain much in Glasgow? :wink: )

Â£9.95 delivered from http://www.ukweathershop.co.uk

Have a great Christmas and Hogmanay!

Lou x


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## Mrs Wallsendmag (Dec 13, 2005)

phodge said:


> As previously stated, it 's very difficult to buy a present for someone you don't know - especially when they keep changing their identity! Have you got something to hide ?? :wink:


Just the fact that I can't spell mt email address


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## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

If she comes attached to the Orgasmatron I might have to get one myself!


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## sssgucci (Nov 20, 2004)

Just like to say Merry Christmas to the Saint [smiley=crowngrin.gif] [smiley=drummer.gif]

Took me a while late last night but I think I found a gift thats suitable for you as we all know you as a bit of a w*****. :lol: :wink:

Spankometer

Wow, I can see it now. The year is 2008 and choking the chicken has become an Olympic Spurt, sorry, Sport and the gold medal can only be attained after years of practice and dedication to the fine art of spanking the monkey. Now you too can train to become a world renowned "athlete" by including this wrist strapped spankometer into your workout program so you can measure your performance and keep a year long record of your wrist swishing activity. Guys just remember, where will you be in 2008?










Price inc VAT: Â£9.99 
Shipping costs: Click here for info 
Availability: In Stock 
Product code: 2988

Customer Reviews:

This is such a cool product! The first time I used it it gave me a shocking sensation, which I was disappointed to find out doesn't happen everytime. However, this product makes jerking off fun again! At 48, the fun wears off. Recommended!

John - March 2005

Nice!!!

Darren - November 2004

http://www.alt-gifts.com/shop/shop/page ... ct_id/2988

It fits just within the budget of Â£12 including delivery.

[smiley=mexicanwave.gif]


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## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

Never realised that I'd let slip about my sexual habbits - but thanks anyway - I do of course see another use for it in categorising the ******** members - great wee tool.

Thanks

And Merry Christmas - to those that it applies to.

For those others......... I'd watch out - Bush maybe invading soon :wink:


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## John C (Jul 5, 2002)

@sssgucci - How did you find out the size of Lorna's wrist, or is it designed to go round her neck?

:twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:


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## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

jacTT225 said:


> @sssgucci - How did you find out the size of Lorna's wrist, or is it designed to go round her neck?
> 
> :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:


muahahahaah how'd you guess I got PMT?


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## The Silver Surfer (May 14, 2002)

t7 said:


> My santa gift is for The Silver Surfer who sadly I have never met (despite debating the merits of a Scottish annual meet with him many moons ago when he still had a TT). After extensive research :wink: I have uncovered the following facts about this elusive individual - reportedly known to select forum members north of the border. Oh and I thought his real name was Ali but I guess superheroes have to use psuedonyms on web forums 8) .
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Awww Lou!!!

You're too kind! Thanks very much for the gift. :lol: :lol: I have to say I'm very impressed with the amount of research you've done on me. :wink: :lol:
The wind speed and direction facility will come in very hand for when I'm using my surf board in and around Glasgow. 8) :lol: :lol:

TBH, you would have been better buying me a couple of buckets, as this is the way we normally measure rain in Glasgow. :lol: Funnily enough, it's a wee bit wet outside right now. (BTW, my user name used to be 'Ali', which is my surname, yes I know, very original......not! Then I decided to change it something a wee bit 8) er.  :lol:

Best wishes to you and your family for a very Happy Christmas and a peaceful New Year

AA
____________________________________________________________

My (not so) secret Santa gift is for ronin.

From your profile, you've listed your interests as 'Ferrets and Weasels'. So, for your delight and delectation, I present to you...............










:lol: :lol: A bargain at only Â£7.95. Click here.

Or how about this "Unusual Pottery Clay Ferret/Mir Cat/Weasel"................










A snip at only $16.99 Click here.

And the third and final choice is............................................................










Coming in at a bargain Â£6.99. Click here.

Just don't be driving like they do in this film when you get your new car. :lol: :lol:

All the best for Christmas and the New Year

A


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## TTotal (Aug 12, 2002)

sssgucci said:


> Just like to say Merry Christmas to the Saint [smiley=crowngrin.gif] [smiley=drummer.gif]
> 
> Spankometer
> 
> ...


  Ok you have found out now


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## Mrs Wallsendmag (Dec 13, 2005)

Wallsendmag II said:


> phodge said:
> 
> 
> > Hello Wallsendmag II and Happy Christmas!
> ...


Although I am a bit upset at the 350Z owners who bought it


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## kingcutter (Aug 1, 2003)

thehornster said:


> Firstly i'd like to thank ratty for my gift!! Youve saved me many a sock now pal :lol: :lol:
> 
> Anyway my secret santa was *Kingcutter*.Ive heard your a hairdresser so heres my choice of gift.
> 
> ...


John

Thats great and you don't know how handy that will be this time of year.
Happy Christmas to you and yours [smiley=crowngrin.gif]


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## jdn (Aug 26, 2002)

auditt260bhp said:


> Well, it's now officially Thursday 22nd December and so here goes my reveal:
> 
> Merry Christmas jdn
> 
> ...


Why, thank you. 

Looks most useful! Perhaps I'll order two...

Merry Christmas to one and all.


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## Hev (Feb 26, 2005)

And my gift is for LISA............ 








Ooops, kinda blown my budget a little (but we girlies do that ) 








Who needs a reason? Every girlie loves chocolate

Happy Chrimbo and have a fantoosh New Year

Hev x


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## straight edge santa (Dec 21, 2005)

Sorry this is late but SES got held up in the..........coffee shop erm yes tha's right a heavy night up all night trying to calm down

So MrTTOTAL you Christmas stocking(s) will be full this yr
with
(either colour now please contain yourself John!)









available to you from this wonderful (cough) site
http://www.noveltiesgalore.com/prod/c91/734/star_glasses.html

I'm sure you're just love'in them
Merry Christmas!


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## genocidalduck (May 19, 2005)

kingcutter said:


> thehornster said:
> 
> 
> > Firstly i'd like to thank ratty for my gift!! Youve saved me many a sock now pal :lol: :lol:
> ...


Nice pressie John......Bet You hadt to do alot of hunting to find the survival kit


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## TTotal (Aug 12, 2002)

straight edge santa said:


> Sorry this is late but SES got held up in the..........coffee shop erm yes tha's right a heavy night up all night trying to calm down
> 
> So MrTTOTAL you Christmas stocking(s) will be full this yr
> with
> ...


Ahh I am now {Elton} John then ! Thanks Straight Edge (who are you?) Santa


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