# Relationships - Again



## scavenger (Jun 25, 2002)

Oh well, that's another one finished and 18 months down the drain 

I am getting quite good at this breaking up malarky, 3 times in 20 years now, I am on a roll :?

I really must try harder to spot the differences from day 1. Either that or stop being a complete knob and accepting the differences :idea:

Still, the social calendar is filling up with man stuff:

Snowboarding in March
Sea fishing in the US in May
3 day bike Track Event in Spain
1 Week golfing in Portugal
Time for some Petee time, nobody other than myself to please for a while I think


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## Dotti (Mar 9, 2003)

What you doing to them to scare them off? :wink:


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## W7 PMC (May 6, 2002)

scavenger said:


> nobody other than myself to please for a while I think


You'd best get stocked up with Kleenex then :lol: :wink:


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

scavenger said:


> Oh well, that's another one finished and 18 months down the drain
> 
> I am getting quite good at this breaking up malarky, 3 times in 20 years now, I am on a roll :?
> 
> ...


So all the 18 months were wasted just cos it didnt work out?

3 break ups in 20 years. What a dreadful track record. You must have major psychological flaws. Just like everyone else really. :wink:

Jokes aside. Chin up. The glass is always half full. Everything happens for a reason, hard as it may be to see when you are right in the thick of it.

Clarity will come. You seem to have plenty of activities planned. Enjoy them.


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## scavenger (Jun 25, 2002)

Dotti said:


> What you doing to them to scare them off? :wink:


Nothing, quite the opposite. It's me who gets fed up. I need an independent woman with her own mind, friends and social life. I don't want to have to be the one to keep them entertained. It's a partnership, they should be able to keep themselves happy and I can still go out with my friends and continue with my own interests without feelings of guilt because they are bored, or sitting at home waiting for my return.

Gives you more to talk about when you are together, you can appreciate that time together and it becomes more special.



W7 PMC said:


> You'd best get stocked up with Kleenex then


That's just wrong that is :roll:


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

scavenger said:


> Dotti said:
> 
> 
> > What you doing to them to scare them off? :wink:
> ...


Houston we have a problem.

If you found someone who wanted to share the experience via talking about fishing, golf, lads' nights out etc after you have done the activity, rather than actually participate in those activities with you, that person might be slightly weird.

Do you consider yourself to be in any way selfish? What do you think someone who reads your above post, and who doesn't know you, may deduce about your character?

Having cake and eating it?

<<The best relationships are those where your love for each other exceeds you need for each other>>
Dali Lama


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## mike_bailey (May 7, 2002)

scavenger said:


> Nothing, quite the opposite. It's me who gets fed up. I need an independent woman with her own mind, friends and social life. I don't want to have to be the one to keep them entertained. It's a partnership, they should be able to keep themselves happy and I can still go out with my friends and continue with my own interests without feelings of guilt because they are bored, or sitting at home waiting for my return.
> 
> Gives you more to talk about when you are together, you can appreciate that time together and it becomes more special.


Blimey, I never thought of doing it that way before :lol:


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## GoingTTooFast (Apr 4, 2006)

garyc said:


> Having cake and eating it?


What's the point of having a cake in the first place if you can't eat it? They're pretty boring for anything other than eating.

Unless you're a clown of course.


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## Private Prozac (Jul 7, 2003)

Sounds like my ideal woman that does.

Can you pm me her number mate?


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## Dotti (Mar 9, 2003)

garyc said:


> scavenger said:
> 
> 
> > Dotti said:
> ...


One answer for it? Scav needs a big butch burd who is into Rugby, Football, fishing while he is boarding with the lads and then on his return they can disguss it over a game of snooker and a pint with pork scratchings      :wink:


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

Having one's cake and eating it...

That's right. It's a literal contradiction in terms, and does not have it's origins in the concept of greed. :roll:


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## scavenger (Jun 25, 2002)

garyc said:


> Houston we have a problem.
> 
> If you found someone who wanted to share the experience via talking about fishing, golf, lads' nights out etc after you have done the activity, rather than actually participate in those activities with you, that person might be slightly weird.
> 
> Do you consider yourself to be in any way selfish? What do you think someone who reads your above post, and who doesn't know you, may deduce about your character?


Me selfish, oh absolutely :wink:

It does read that way, 'twas a quick post! There were other reasons, but her not being able to accommodate my size is not really something I should discuss on a forum [smiley=sleeping.gif]

What I was trying to convey was more about having some level of independence. The last 2 women I have dated seemed to have been completely dependent on me providing their fun which in the long term is a strain. To have feelings of guilt when you go and do something away from them is wrong, surely?

I go clay pigeon shooting for a couple of hours a fortnight. I play the odd game of golf, go to the pub with my mates once a week. Should I feel like I cant do that or worse still, stop doing that, because I have a partner who does nothing?

We would still go out together 4 times a week, I don't think it is unreasonable or selfish to still do my "man stuff".

I would be very happy to have a partner that has a busy social life. I would be happy for them that they were doing things they wanted to do, I wouldn't sit there and be bored till they came back home; I have 5 pubs near my house, mates, xbox 360, a motorbike, ......... :roll: :-* :wink:


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## Major Audi Parts Guru (May 7, 2002)

Can I suggest that you go Speed dating when you feel a bit better. I did it last year and it was damn good :wink:


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## genocidalduck (May 19, 2005)

Well sounds abit like me....I'm totally selfish. Do my own thing when i want. Which stresses girls that i go out with. Because i never actually plan to do something. More off just wake up one morning. Say "hun i'm going on holiday for a few weeks. See ya when i get back...Byeee".

Hence i don't hold down relationships.

However i still like female company, but would never pay for it. So you get what all single blokes have. A little black book. When your feeling that you need some female company. Pick one from your book. Depending on your mood ofcourse. If you just want a cuddle and watch a movie. Phone the loving cuddly one. If you just fancy a chat. Phone the intelligent one. If ya fancy a shag. Phone the slapper. There you go easy. 

Just one important thing. Make sure those girls understand it's just casual. Or your gunna get a whole heap off problems. I've learn the hard way.


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

genocidalduck said:


> Well sounds abit like me....I'm totally selfish. Do my own thing when i want. Which stresses girls that i go out with. Because i never actually plan to do something. More off just wake up one morning. Say "hun i'm going on holiday for a few weeks. See ya when i get back...Byeee".
> 
> Hence i don't hold down relationships.
> 
> ...


Yes, but weren't you living with your mum til recently? :wink:


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

scavenger said:


> garyc said:
> 
> 
> > Houston we have a problem.
> ...


You are probably best off spending some time on your own, until you meet someone who makes you want to spend time with them more than anything else....and then get back into the boys own stuff, when you can start on the next phase of your relationship cycle that you may have unconsiously found yourself in before. But you may end up here again.

You are the product of all your decsions.

:wink:


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## genocidalduck (May 19, 2005)

garyc said:


> genocidalduck said:
> 
> 
> > Well sounds abit like me....I'm totally selfish. Do my own thing when i want. Which stresses girls that i go out with. Because i never actually plan to do something. More off just wake up one morning. Say "hun i'm going on holiday for a few weeks. See ya when i get back...Byeee".
> ...


I still not living with her. Just living in her house. shes still in hospital


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## Major Audi Parts Guru (May 7, 2002)

garyc said:


> You are the product of all your decsions.
> 
> :wink:


Indeed you are, well said Gary :wink:


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

Major Audi Parts Guru said:


> garyc said:
> 
> 
> > You are the product of all your decsions.
> ...


It's worth keeping in mind, when from time to time the sky falls in on ones life. :wink:

Things do have a habit of working out though. But we may have to break a few other habits first. :wink:

I am sure Scavenger has all his bases covered and will come through smiling.


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

garyc said:


> Having one's cake and eating it...
> 
> That's right. It's a literal contradiction in terms, and does not have it's origins in the concept of greed. :roll:


Actually it's not.

It's perfectly possible to have a cake and then eat it.

What the phrase SHOULD be is:

"One can not eat one's cake and have it".


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## jampott (Sep 6, 2003)

Kell said:


> garyc said:
> 
> 
> > Having one's cake and eating it...
> ...


You *can* have your cake and eat it if you buy 2 cakes in the first place.


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## GoingTTooFast (Apr 4, 2006)

jampott said:


> Kell said:
> 
> 
> > garyc said:
> ...


That's just greedy.. So garyc was right!


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## Widget (May 7, 2002)

genocidalduck said:


> A little black book.


Aah, the Chictionary.


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