# You phone the local mental Hospital and . . . .



## brittan (May 18, 2007)

Hello, and thank you for calling the state mental hospital.

Please select one of the following options:

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4 5 & 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want; stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.

If you are dyslexic press 96969696969696969696.

If you are bipolar please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self esteem please hang up, our operators are too busy to speak to you.

If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever.

If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up.


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## YELLOW_TT (Feb 25, 2004)

:lol: I had this as my ring tone a couple of years ago


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## ecko2702 (Jan 26, 2009)

LOL there's a number you can dial here in the states and that comes up and talk you through everything.


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## y3putt (Mar 29, 2008)

:lol:


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