# when close friends die.......



## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

I received some really sad, awful news on Monday whilst away on holiday.

Funerals for old people are bad enough.

Funerals for people you once loved, planned and hoped to spend the rest your life with, in sickness or in health, must be even worse...........


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## coupe-sport (May 7, 2002)

- sorry to hear that Lisa.

James.


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## Guest (Jun 4, 2003)

my condolences


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## Kell (May 28, 2002)

A friend of mine died on Boxing day of last year. Wasn't even thirty and died of Cancer, I know how you feel and exactly what you're going through.

My condolences to you and to the family.


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## teucer2000 (May 14, 2002)

I lost my wife in a car accident in 95 and all you can do is remember the good times and do your best to make the most of the rest of your life. And NEVER leave the house without telling your partner how much you love them.


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## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

The friend to whom I refer, was my ex-husband, Mark. We were together for 8 years, then he foolishly had an affair with my sister, so that ended our marriage. Â


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## head_ed (Dec 10, 2002)

> He, Mark, was my husband. We were together for 8 years until my sister stole him away......


That's awful news Lisa sorry to hear that and it was horrible for your sister to do that to you in the first place! :'(

PJ


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## ccc (May 7, 2002)

Sad news, Lisa - all my sympathy.


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## nutts (May 8, 2002)

No words can ever express the loss. If you want to talk, let me know.


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## paulb (May 6, 2002)

Lisa, my deepest condolances. There is nothing more I can say except that my thoughts are with you.

Paul


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## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

Don't get me wrong, I'm not asking for anyones sympathy or condolences. But thank you. Those are for his closest family and friends.

He represents to me sad and painful times as well as many happy ones......

I guess if you knew the full story his death was inevitable, it just doesn't make the fact easier to bear that he is no longer here.

He is/was 41, funny, arrogant, immensely popular.
Sadly missed.


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## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

I wish I could tell you the full, truly sad story, because reading this through it doesn't tell you anything at all.

But thanks again for all your kind words
Teucer, your story just shows how no-one on here really knows what people have been through, thank you for the advise, advise I think we should all take. Â


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## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

> No words can ever express the loss. If you want to talk, let me know. Â  Â


Thanks Nutts  but I think I'm ok, next week will be harder.


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## kctt (Nov 10, 2002)

Lisa,

Know how that feels............
A thought for you
Kx


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## t7 (Nov 2, 2002)

Lisa I'm so sorry.

L


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## David_A (May 7, 2002)

Deepest condolences, was my nans funeral a couple of weeks ago. Definately the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life. Still not over it really.

Time is great healer.

Dave


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## Dubcat (Jun 10, 2002)

Lisa - i'm sorry and hope time heals your pain quickly 

Teucer - your post touched me. My deepest sympathies for what you have been through 

Amir.


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## 55JWB (May 7, 2002)

I'm not very religious but when I lost my brother I remember someone giving me these words :'(

One night I dreamed I was walking 
Along the beach with the Lord.

Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky. 
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.

Sometimes there were two sets of footprints. 
Other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed that 
During the low periods of my life when I was

Suffering from anguish, sorrow, or defeat, 
I could see only one set of footprints,

So I said to the Lord, "You promised me, 
Lord, that if I followed You,
You would walk with me always.

But I noticed that during the most trying periods 
Of my life there have only been 
One set of prints in the sand.

Why, When I have needed You most,
You have not been there for me?"

The Lord replied, 
"The times when you have seen only one set of footprints
Is when I carried you."


Be strong next week, even though we dont know you, you have probably touched many people with this thread and reminded some of us about personal circumstances.

I really hope all goes well

Jason


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## Rhod_TT (May 7, 2002)

Lisa,

Well, I can't really say I know how you are feeling as everyone feels differently when they have to experience the loss of someone close to them. But I know that the funeral of someone "old" is easier than that of someone around your age.

When my grandfather died I wasn't that upset. He had already had three strokes, was 82 yrs old and frankly, it was time for him to die. He wasn't happy to live life in the state he was in.

When I was in high school one of my friends died in a drink driving accident (he wasn't the driver, but there was four kids in the car and they were all drunk, so I've always felt that it was partly his fault too) and that was really hard. It made me realise as a teenager that we are not immortal, and that was a real shock to the system. I've looked on life differently from that day onwards, and perhaps that was the impetus behind me deciding that I never want to be drunk in my life. (And just in case you're wondering I never have been.)

All I can say is my sympathies, and I hope it doesn't change your life (or the way you think about it) for the worse.


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

Sorry to hear bad news Lisa. Awful.

It seems to have been a bad year for friends - I've lost two very close friends this year, one to alchohol, one to a very violent suicide a month ago; both in their 30s, both leaving family.

It's always such a waste. Life is still pretty cool though. Live every day BG.
gary


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## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

Gosh I feel awful for making this post now i seem to have made everyone upset. That wasn't my intention, i'm sorry.

I guess the day I knew I would face one day finally came on Monday. Except it wasn't. 
We knew as young innocent things that it would arrive, they said just 3-5 years but as it turned out he lived another 18. 
An innocent victim of Americas greed/bad habits/bad practises.

So his death just bought back all the pain and anguish we went through back in 1985, our promises, our unfullfilled dreams, my unquestionable resolve to stay with him forever and all of that.

We wondered how it would be, know we know.

Keep smiling, tis ok. Â

I have remarried, have two wonderful boys now.


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## teucer2000 (May 14, 2002)

As Lisa says....keep smiling everyone. I've also been lucky enough to meet a new lady and we are getting married next year. The experience that Lisa, myself and many others of us have gone through should prove that none of us should ever take life or our loved ones for granted.


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## garyc (May 7, 2002)

Group hug? 

PS Always maintain your sense of humour.

PPS On account of this thread, I told Mrs C I loved her 'more' before I left base this am. So something positive already...


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## Carlos (May 6, 2002)

A very sobering thread.

Possibly the most meaningful I have yet read on the TT forum.

I'm truly sorry for all those who have contributed with their own stories.


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## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

> Group hug?
> 
> PS Always maintain your sense of humour.
> 
> PPS On account of this thread, I told Mrs C I loved her 'more' before I left base this am. Â So something positive already...


Yeah I kind of feel like telling a joke at this point.

Three blokes arrive at the gates of heaven, and are greeted by St Peter. He says to the first man 'Have you been a good person?' The first man replies: 'yes, I've led a truly worthwhile life, and I've never been unfaithful to my wife.' So St.Peter gives him a Rolls Royce to aid his travels in heaven.
Then St Peter asks the second man if he's led a good life. The second man replies :'well mostly I've been honest and caring, but I have been unfaithfull to my wife once.'
'Very Well,' replies St. Peter 'you may have a Ford Fiesta.'

He goes to the third man and asks him the same question, to which the man replies:' Well, no. I've stolen from my loved ones, and I've not been faithfull to my wife for more than a week.' So St. Peter gives the third man a bicycle.

A few days later, the second man and the third man pass the first man, who's in his gleaming Rolls Royce, sobbing his heart out. The second man asks him: 'whats the matter? If i had your car I'd be the happiest man here!'

'I was' he replies, 'but I've just seen my wife, and she was on roller skates.' Â Â


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## aidb (Mar 19, 2003)

Lisa, I hope this little poem helps you.

The Rainbows end

Beyond the rainbowâ€™s end there lies
The land of love and light.
Where shadows never dim the skies
For there, there is no light.
And though the loss is hard to bear
Of loved one or of friend
We know that we shall find you there
Beyond the rainbowâ€™s end


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## TTotal (Aug 12, 2002)

Lovely Aido , really nice thanks for that !


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## pgm (May 7, 2002)

Respect and empathy to everybody in this thread - especially those who have felt such alot of pain.
Peter


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