# The things that piss me off today



## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

Adverts

Ok Firstly "this is not just a potato, it's a Marks and Spencer's potato" Marks and Spenser Food adverts!!! ARRRRRRGGGGHHH It's a potato! FFS Idiots.

And now the new M&S clothes adverts, annoying music, annoying models pulling silly faces who are not at all typical of the women who shop at Marks, and probably never will, Marks is for fat old great aunts, and fuddy duddy mumsy types and probably always will be. And no , not even Twiggy could convert me to think otherwise! Idiots.

And special nappies that feel damp so toddlers know they've pissed themselves? eh? when they feel cold piss sodden trousers and soggy socks they soon get the idea and so much quicker than just feeling a little uncomfortable. When potty training just leave the nappies off and persevere, what could be simpler. Idiots.

Drivers (others, not me )

Ok I'm at a T junction waiting to turn right, don't pull up right beside blocking my view and your own for that matter, think about it. If you hang back a little so you can see THROUGH my car so that you can turn left without blocking my view or your own. Or is it just me that shows this consideration?? Sometimes it feels like it. Pisses me right off. Idiots.

Oh and if you are turning right into a side road, don't cut the corner and then be surprised that you find yourself in the path of another vehicle approaching the junction. Idiots again.

And don't park on the corner by the bakery because that's such a bloody hazard. Park 10-20 yards further down the road so that when I turn off the main road into my street I don't have to immediately stop ( risking a car going up my ass on the main road) because you idiots have blocked the road on both sides to get your frigging pies!

There.

I'm going to have a Weetabix now


----------



## CH_Peter (May 16, 2002)

Round our way parking opposite and on junctions seems to be the norm. Drives me utterly mental as well. PLus the daft bint in her Rover drives far too fast onto our tiny cul-de-sac and has twice (that I've seen) caused people to slam on the brakes and then she once almost reversed into me.

Small cul-de-sac of barely 200yds where people park all over the place? Less than 30mph probably sensible. :x


----------



## genocidalduck (May 19, 2005)

Lisa. said:


> Adverts
> 
> Ok Firstly "this is not just a potato, it's a Marks and Spencer's potato" Marks and Spenser Food adverts!!! ARRRRRRGGGGHHH It's a potato! FFS Idiots.
> 
> ...


I would agree with you on the second and third points about drivers. Doing as many miles as i used to do around town it used to piss me off that osme people are just so fecking stupid.

I have nop opinion on potatoes other than i have to have them with every meal. ( potatoholic i guess ) and as for clothes i wouldnt know M&S dont do anything to catch my attention to go shopping in there. And have no kids to worry about potty training and nappies even though i want to learn [smiley=bigcry.gif]

Now for things that piss me off! 

Actually cant think of anything except women but i think thats just because im lonely [smiley=bigcry.gif]


----------



## YELLOW_TT (Feb 25, 2004)

genocidalduck said:


> Actually cant think of anything except women but i think thats just because im lonely [smiley=bigcry.gif]


if i was you i think i would keep clear of women you know what happend last time :wink: :lol:


----------



## garyc (May 7, 2002)

Hi Lisa,

Having grumpy day? :wink:

Can I add:

- the twat with a sports bike complete with silly exhaust who starts it everymorning at 6am, and runs it whilst he fiddles with his gay leathers

- the people on garage forecourts who dont move to the furthest pump and always leave a space in front whilst others wait behind.

- the people who dont realise that regardless of what side your filler cap is on, with a little thought, and careful positioning you can fill from both sides without damaging paintwork.

- the medical student git whose mummy just bought the house next door for her whilst she completes her studies - for a mere Â£475K - oh, and would you f**kin beleive it, the spoilt brat also has a brand new Mini.

- The mothers who abandon the SUV on the zig zags outside most Bristiol schools.

- My company car scheme for making options trade offs so complicated and not enabling me to get the spec I want in budget.

- The Maserati 4200 driver who cut me up this am and then ranted at me for 'allowing' my front end to scrape his rear paint as he cut across my bow. (although I did have to remind him that his was the nicer car, mine is a co car that I hate, and I have redundancy looming, so really dont care if he wants to bully and then get all red-faced about it. :lol: :lol: )

- The beardy twat with foul breath that cornered me in the pub last night telling me how Unix is the True Way and that my co were doomed -(fuck knows how we have survived 60+years with all these pub business experts) like i really care.

- Jenson Button for being wealthy enough at 25 to be able to bung Frank W $30m to be released from his 2006 committment.

- Footballers -just for being thick and overpaid.

- Bernie Ecclestone for being short.

- Anyone who allows their car to occupy enough space for two cars when spaces are short.

- That irrating twat who just will not leave the outside lane for 20miles, then sweeps in across all three lanes at the 300 metre marker to his exit.

- the drivers who cannot comprehend what 'Merge in Turn means'

- the skinny affected twat bloke who sat next to me in a canteen wearing knee length doc martens, peach legins, a pink leopard pirnt vest, dangly earings, a beret and black eye liner. I dont care if you are a 'creative' and expressing your diversity within corp guidelines - you scared the crap out of my customers and resemble a nasty 45 year old blend of Clinger from MASH and Brian Molko.

- the makers of Bovril for taking the beef out of the product and turning it into a Marmite. If I wanted Marmite, I'd have bought it in first place.

- Pringles for not containing very much real potato

- The clever ring tones that go off every 10secs in this office, whilst my phone is on Meeting setting.

But I am in a good mood.


----------



## dee (Jun 3, 2005)

good flame gary! :lol:


----------



## CH_Peter (May 16, 2002)

garyc said:


> - the people on garage forecourts who dont move to the furthest pump and always leave a space in front whilst others wait behind.


To be fair... sometimes the car in front drives away first. But I'm with you on the rest...


----------



## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

garyc said:


> Hi Lisa,
> 
> Having grumpy day? :wink:
> 
> ...


----------



## garyc (May 7, 2002)

saint said:


> garyc said:
> 
> 
> > Hi Lisa,
> ...


f&&K me! Some personal digs in there eh Saint? :roll:

Just remember it's my *light-hearted, ironic, *personal, non PC irrational tirade 'bout some things that were pissing me off. Extrapolate what you want....

Come up with yer own, then I can have my own personal and trite dig at you. :wink:


----------



## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

Note To Self - gotta remember to use that same bait when am out fishing :wink:


----------



## garyc (May 7, 2002)

Quite. Now go get back to being a public servant. :wink:


----------



## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

garyc said:


> Quite. Now go get back to being a public servant. :wink:


Suppose that's why we pay our council tax eh....great value for money.....


----------



## sssgucci (Nov 20, 2004)

Must be that time of the month Lisa [smiley=drummer.gif]


----------



## sonicmonkey (Mar 20, 2004)

saint said:


> garyc said:
> 
> 
> > Hi Lisa,
> ...


His twat of a twin brother must live in my close then....6.00am every fucking morning :evil:

Can I add Olives to the list? What the hell are they about? Little nudgets of Satans poo poo.


----------



## Nando (Feb 5, 2004)

sonicmonkey said:


> Can I add Olives to the list? What the hell are they about? Little nudgets of Satans poo poo.


 :lol:


----------



## scott28tt (Jul 30, 2002)

This is the best thread on here for weeks :lol:

LOL @ garyc :lol:


----------



## garyc (May 7, 2002)

I love olives, but will nominate brussels sprouts - the devils vegetable if ever there was one. :twisted:


----------



## BAMTT (Feb 22, 2004)

That Dickhead in a Kangoo van on the M20 this am who would'nt move out of the outside lane despite the other lanes being empty, who i finally under took after 2 mile's then starts flashing me like crazy..


----------



## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

garyc said:


> I love olives, but will nominate brussels sprouts - the devils vegetable if ever there was one. :twisted:


Nah - it's gotta be cucumber or melon


----------



## NaughTTy (Jul 9, 2003)

I love this - almost a flame room within a flame room :lol:


----------



## jonno (May 7, 2002)

saint said:


> garyc said:
> 
> 
> > I love olives, but will nominate brussels sprouts - the devils vegetable if ever there was one. :twisted:
> ...


I'm with Gary as far as Olives and sprouts go..... 
another nomination - sweetcorn. Utterly pointless stuff.... except when transformed by those nice folk @ Kellogs into Crunchy Nut Cornflakes. 

Capers - anyone have a strong view? :roll:


----------



## NaughTTy (Jul 9, 2003)

saint said:


> garyc said:
> 
> 
> > I love olives, but will nominate brussels sprouts - the devils vegetable if ever there was one. :twisted:
> ...


Is melon a vegetable :? :wink:

*Edit* Is cucumber even a vegetable? (Discuss!)


----------



## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

<sigh> I knew I should have put a wee footnote in.


----------



## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

Oh - and an olive is not a veg either - just incase there was any Confutious :wink:


----------



## NaughTTy (Jul 9, 2003)

saint said:


> <sigh> I knew I should have put a wee footnote in.


Quick - hit the Edit button, no-one will notice :wink:


----------



## garyc (May 7, 2002)

saint said:


> Oh - and an olive is not a veg either - just incase there was any Confutious :wink:


tomato is a fruit.


----------



## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

A banana is a herb.


----------



## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

Well it grows on a herb not a ( banana) tree. So it's the fruit from a herb.


----------



## NaughTTy (Jul 9, 2003)

garyc said:


> saint said:
> 
> 
> > Oh - and an olive is not a veg either - just incase there was any Confutious :wink:
> ...


Oh - don't get me started on tomatoes - bloody hate the things (in their raw form) spewing seeds and juice everywhere at the slightlest touch of a sharp object :evil: :roll:


----------



## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

sssgucci said:


> Must be that time of the month Lisa [smiley=drummer.gif]


Don't be ridiculous, I'm this grumpy every day of the month. I don't need an excuse.


----------



## dee (Jun 3, 2005)

NaughTTy said:


> saint said:
> 
> 
> > garyc said:
> ...


 :lol:


----------



## jampott (Sep 6, 2003)

Lisa. said:


> Well it grows on a herb not a ( banana) tree. So it's the fruit from a herb.


Actually its a berry (honestly).


----------



## jampott (Sep 6, 2003)

garyc said:


> saint said:
> 
> 
> > Oh - and an olive is not a veg either - just incase there was any Confutious :wink:
> ...


I'll go on record saying that a tomato (like the aforementioned banana) is actually a berry.


----------



## clived (May 6, 2002)

jampott said:


> I'll go on record saying that a tomato (like the aforementioned banana) is actually a berry.


Will you be downloading it to your iPod?


----------



## jampott (Sep 6, 2003)

clived said:


> jampott said:
> 
> 
> > I'll go on record saying that a tomato (like the aforementioned banana) is actually a berry.
> ...


I might do...

(going slightly off topic, I tried most of the widely recognised "colours" in the search function of iTunes and created a very colourful playlist with the result. Black, White, Blue, Red, Purple, Yellow etc. Excellent theme  )


----------



## NaughTTy (Jul 9, 2003)

clived said:


> jampott said:
> 
> 
> > I'll go on record saying that a tomato (like the aforementioned banana) is actually a berry.
> ...


or your Blackberry :lol: (yes, I know you haven't got one but I couldn't resist :wink: )


----------



## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

jampott said:


> garyc said:
> 
> 
> > saint said:
> ...


Been asking Oxford again??

http://www.askoxford.com


----------



## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

Though that site does contradict itself.

http://www.askoxford.com/asktheexperts/ ... na?view=uk

and

http://www.askoxford.com/concise_oed/berry?view=uk

It says that a banana is a fruit and a berry and grows on a herb.


----------



## Kell (May 28, 2002)

I just read recently that the Banana is technically a flower - not a fruit or a berry.


----------



## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

I think we are all bananas and smoking too much herb


----------



## Dotti (Mar 9, 2003)

The things that piss me off today :-

: McDonalds adverts first thing in the morning on tele.
: Hair braid Adverts first thing in the morning on tele.
: Fiona friggin Philips.
: This Septemeber weather.
: Lack of sex.
: Wingy winey people.
: The want for chocolate but can't decide which variety
: Housework
: Work
: Friggin supermarket cashiers
: Clicky school mothers
: Little aeroplanes doing acrobates right over my house - tossers!
: And the fact my list is endless

Think I will go and [smiley=rifle.gif] myself ! [smiley=idea2.gif]


----------



## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

For a second there I thought you concluded with

"and my life is pointless"

I was about to agree.


----------



## Dotti (Mar 9, 2003)

LOL ... :lol: good point very true! :lol:


----------



## saint (Dec 6, 2002)

:roll:


----------



## Lisa. (May 7, 2002)

^Abi^ said:


> The things that piss me off today :-
> 
> : McDonalds adverts first thing in the morning on tele.
> : Hair braid Adverts first thing in the morning on tele.
> ...


Penny Sodding Smith is far far more annoying than Fiona friggin Philips.
I like the weather at the moment, It means I can get my top down, pnar pnar.
Lack of sex? I thought you were a married woman or did I miss something??
Though fear not, I'm sure you could get a good seeing to if you get really desperate.
I don't like chocolate in any case.
Work is ok, if you're the boss 8) 
Agree with you about supermarket cashiers, especially the ones that think it's a race to get the stuff down the conveyor belt quicker than you can get it in the bags.
Don't know about cliquey mums, I always snub them.
Little aeroplanes?


----------



## Dotti (Mar 9, 2003)

Oh yeah another piss off today that is happening right now is friggin noisy friggin neighbours with friggin noisy Mountfort friggin lawn mowers with a friggin one and only friggin spoilt frigwit for a friggin noisey shit bag of a two year old son screaming in the garden trying to out do the friggin lawnmower! :x

Think I will shout out the window to shut the frig up before I strangle the litte bastard and tell him his wife was caught shagging the neighbour next door while he was at work! :lol:


----------



## dee (Jun 3, 2005)

^Abi^ said:


> .... and tell him his wife was caught shagging the neighbour next door while he was at work! :lol:


jealous Abi ? :roll: :wink:


----------



## Dotti (Mar 9, 2003)

dee said:


> ^Abi^ said:
> 
> 
> > .... and tell him his wife was caught shagging the neighbour next door while he was at work! :lol:
> ...


Not, not at all. I just don't like noise and selfish inconsiderate parents who allow their snotty little noisy spoilt brats to scream at the top of their voice, with no consideration to others around them who may want to sit quietly and enjoy their garden . After all, I don't let my boys scream and shout so why should I accept other peoples green snotty noised little toe rags! . And my lawn mower is quiet too :-*


----------



## scott28tt (Jul 30, 2002)

OK, my course students this week have been really pissing me off!

Student 1 can't follow simple instructions such as 'log on as Bob' - he logs on as someone totally different, then wonders why the exercise fails!

Student 2 gets told NOT to do steps E and F of the exercise instructions as they don't work properly and cause later exercises to fail. 10 minutes later he tells me "it's not working". Yep, that'll be because you followed steps E and F, you stupid fucker!

Student 3 is shown a screen shot from Control Panel in Windows, I tell him "As you can see the text is displayed in English". "No it's not" he replies. "What do you mean?" I ask. "It's in American" he says. Shut the fuck up Student 3!

Student 4 is told by me that you can go on ebay and buy a CD of MCSE practice questions for 5.99. "What, you can buy an MCSE for 5.99!!" he says. No, you stupid doodah, just a CD of questions!!

Student 4 also likes finishing off my sentences for me - incorrectly! He also butts in when I'm mid-sentence and then gives me a funny look when I ask him to wait til I'm finished. Engage your ears for a minute and shut yer gob!

Can't wait to finish today's course, then they can all fuck off back to work and piss someone else off next week!!

Ahh, this is good therapy this.....


----------



## r1 (Oct 31, 2002)

scott28tt said:


> OK, my course students this week have been really pissing me off!
> 
> Student 1 can't follow simple instructions such as 'log on as Bob' - he logs on as someone totally different, then wonders why the exercise fails!
> 
> ...


I'd suggest you have a low tolerance...

I'd start my own flame but as I've had the week from hell I just want to forget about it and think about the weekend.


----------



## s3_lurker (May 6, 2002)

The f'ing brain dead bint at the top of a narrow road as I am half way up who still drives down towards me as if there's nothing there and then we're bumper to bumper for five minutes until I reverse all the way down again. You stupid munt ... if you had bothered to look at the road beyond the bonnet of your 'orrible old Astra you would have realised that by waiting all of 10 seconds I would have been up, out and away.

Cupid stunt .....

:evil:


----------



## Dotti (Mar 9, 2003)

Nothing pissed me off today


----------

